Human ambitions: what they are, what the definition of the term is and how they are realized

Most of our readers, and we are sure of this, have encountered ambitious individuals. Or they themselves are such. But if such a person meets in a company, then it is easy to identify him. He is confident in himself, stands “above others”, and has inflated demands on his destiny. It is precisely such individuals who achieve high results if, in addition to ambition, they use other characteristic character traits to achieve goals - perseverance, diligence, hard work, determination, etc. But let's find out how good it is to be ambitious, and what a person's low ambitions mean, why, for what reason this trait is formed.

What is ambition

According to the definition of psychologists, ambition is a certain level of ambition of a person striving to achieve his goals. The main desires of this type are to be the center of attention on a positive basis, to be held in high esteem and to be content with the respect of others. Such a person devotes his life to achieving both material and professional benefits by realizing his abilities in various fields corresponding to his interests.

We often say about such people: “He will achieve a lot! He needs everything from this life!” In cases where a person does not make a claim to this life and does not want to achieve much, he is considered a person with a low level of ambition.

And the one who sets ambitious goals for himself and is ready to “gnaw the earth” just to achieve the set goals is considered a person with inflated ambitions. Based on everything described, we can imagine an easy and quickly memorized interpretation of an ambitious person. This is the status that a person is aiming for - it can be overestimated or underestimated.

How to develop ambition

Learn to give an objective assessment of your abilities and actions. To do this, you need to try to look at yourself from the outside, think about the topics “what are you like,” “can you change?”
Understand your desires, clearly formulate them, think through acceptable ways to help implement your plans.
Be completely confident in yourself and your abilities, do not be afraid of mistakes, realize that they are given to us for experience, draw conclusions from them.
Set priorities, do it right, set only achievable goals. When results are obtained from them, set even higher standards for yourself that were previously beyond your means, and try to achieve them.
Learn to respond adequately to mistakes, admit them, listen to what others say, and do not be offended by their criticism.

How are human ambitions realized?

The term “ambition” is treated differently in different nationalities. For example, since ancient times in Rus' modesty, calmness, poise, respect, and selflessness have been held in high esteem. And if someone says that he is ambitious, then he is treated negatively. Since the word is associated with pride, pride, arrogance. But as far as European culture is concerned, they hold the word ambition in high esteem. They perceive it as a desire to achieve their goals, implement plans, and be successful.

It is worth understanding that the word “ambition” itself is not translated entirely positively. In English, “ambition” means vanity, ambition, vanity. And for this reason, in European countries, in some cases, the attitude towards ambition is very ambiguous.

There is a fact - ambitious people are often distinguished by their arrogance, boastfulness, arrogance, and even deceitful character. They are arrogant, arrogant, cynical and can, as they say, go “over corpses” just to satisfy their ambitions.

A negative attitude towards an ambitious person is often due to the fact that because of his claims, others feel discomfort. For example, if a person wants to buy an expensive car, he has to save on the family budget. Of course, in such a situation such a person will be treated negatively.

It’s the same with a woman for whom the main thing is to climb the career ladder. She doesn’t want to have children, she spends a long time in the office and doesn’t think about what people are waiting for her at home. And it is quite natural that this state of affairs causes discomfort due to the career woman’s ambitions.

Why are people afraid to set ambitious goals?

Distinguish between goal setting and simply dreaming about something. If you simply imagine yourself as a superhero without claiming such embodiment, this is not a goal, but only a dream. But a dream becomes a goal when you clearly say to yourself: “I want to realize this.” Accordingly, many people dream ambitiously, but only a few dare to turn dreams into goals. Why are people afraid to set ambitious goals?

It's simple: they are afraid of being upset. Ambitiousness indicates that at the moment a person is far from what he wants to have. The longer it takes a person to achieve what he wants, the more ambitious the goal becomes. If he could easily achieve what he wanted, then the goal was not ambitious. He is afraid of being upset that he will not achieve what he wants. It’s better to set a small goal and achieve it, rather than a task that will take years to solve (“What if it doesn’t work out? What if I change my mind? I’ll just waste my time”).

A person is afraid of being disappointed in his goal. This is quite possible if he dreams of an imposed goal. It does not come from within the person himself, it is not a rush of his personal interests and desires. He just saw something somewhere from someone, he wanted the same thing. And while he reaches her, he may understand that he does not need her. And time and effort have already been spent. What a disappointment!

A person will not be disappointed if he tries to achieve a goal that was based on his own values, interests and desires. Here a simple question arises: is a person ready to do everything possible to achieve what he wants? Often, only one thing is required of him: to change himself so much that his thoughts, words, actions and resources provide what he wants. In other words, a person must develop habitual actions that he will perform automatically, which is why he will get what he wants every day. If he cannot achieve his goal today, then he does not have the habits that would help him have what he wants.

What are the types of ambitions?

As we already know, ambitions can be overestimated or underestimated. But let's look at each of them separately.

So, inflated ambitions - a person sets goals for himself, but for this he has neither financial, nor intellectual, nor time grounds. He acts arrogant and swaggering, boasts, but in reality he is nothing of himself. A simple and accessible example is girls from the outback who dream of becoming stage stars. No, no one is saying that there are no talented people in the province. But if we are talking about someone who has neither a voice, nor artistry, nor an attractive appearance, then what kind of fulfillment of desires in terms of “stardom” can we talk about?
Low ambitions - a person sets himself small-scale, simple desires and does not pretend to anything more in this life. The question may concern the choice of the other half, career, material wealth.
There is also a third type of ambition – adequate. Already by the name we understand that quality is inherent in an intelligent, intellectually developed, wise person. Such types are capable of achieving their goals, but they go towards them gradually, without disturbing the quality of life of those around them and taking into account the interests of loved ones. Ambitions can concern different areas of life. Therefore, psychologists also distinguish political, careerist, champion, imperial and other types of ambitions.

Experts also distinguish between different areas:

Professional. Those who decided to build an excellent career, achieve a high and well-paid position, and have as many people as possible subordinates have precisely this type of ambition. Quality is inherent to owners of holdings, offices, and enterprises. But if the road to realizing your desires was wrong, the wrong decisions were made, you can remain a banal workaholic and never achieve what you want. It is important to set priorities on time and correctly and abandon the secondary, unimportant.

Family. In this case, a person wants to find an ideal soul mate and build harmonious family relationships in which there will be no place for scandals and omissions. In his dreams, there is always a picture of a family in which there are children, where everyone is friends, communicates, is frank and honest with each other. Well, this is a normal and completely realizable desire. The main thing is not to overdo it with the ideal partner. If you demand from your spouse (wife) to conform to the ideal personality, conflicts and breakup are possible.

It is worth understanding that ideal people do not exist. And if your picture of the future is violated by the usual quarrel, omissions, refusal of children to obey and do everything their own way - you live in an illusory world. Look at yourself from the outside. Does your attitude towards others, your character traits and habits correspond to your dreams of an ideal family? It is unlikely that you also have shortcomings. The main thing is to find love and understanding, and everything else can be survived.

In the heat of building ideal family relationships, ambitious parents often force their children to live up to their ideals. The requirement to study better, to achieve success in languages, exact sciences and other subjects can lead to a child’s nervous breakdown and rebellion. At one point, he will refuse to do anything at all and, to prove his independence, will go to great lengths.

In order to at least get closer to your desires, you should learn to talk to your child, listen and hear his arguments. Connection, openness and trust are essential. This is the only way to find a common language. Imposing your ambitious family plans on everyone is stupid and counterproductive.

Financial. Well, we have many like-minded people on this issue. Who among us does not dream of improving our financial affairs? And make sure that you don’t need anything, don’t look for anything, don’t borrow in order to “plug” money holes in the family budget. But believe me, our problems have nothing to do with financial ambitions. There is a desire here to have lots and lots and lots of money. In this case, unlike normal people who want to live like a human being, everything is aimed at only one thing - to have wealth. In such cases, ambitious people do not think about others, they become greedy, stingy and pragmatic in everything.

Political. We can watch the activities of individuals with political ambitions every day on television. These are deputies, officials, political scientists, presidents, chancellors, prime ministers, etc. But it is worth understanding that such persons do not just aim to occupy some high position. They dream of ruling states and enjoying the authority of almost the entire planet. As a rule, future politicians have been interested in political talk shows, magazines, and newspapers since childhood. They begin their political “career” while still at school. They participate in the editorial board, publish wall newspapers, hold a post in the school parliament, participate in debate clubs, etc.

Developing ambition in yourself

Many people are interested in how to become ambitious. It is important to understand that people who strive for high achievements have to sacrifice something (for example, reading books, engaging in self-development instead of having fun with friends).

Usually they have considerable willpower to overcome laziness, choose useful activities, and give preference to work rather than entertainment. At critical moments in life, they are able to mobilize strength, cope with panic, navigate the situation and respond adequately to it. How to become an ambitious person in the good sense of the word:

Set goals that will help you move on and fill your life with meaning.
Do not praise yourself to colleagues and relatives, despite the successes achieved.
Do not talk about your ideas and plans until they are implemented (fulfilled).
Don’t be afraid to take risks, try yourself in new social and professional roles, explore new facets of your capabilities, and reveal your talents.
Be open to communication and different opinions, listen and try to understand another point of view - information that comes from outside can be useful for solving personal problems.
Focus on your projects and make every effort to implement them.
Do not compete with others - racing with obstacles and irreconcilable competition wastes energy and distracts from the main goals.
Communicate with other people focused on success and achievement.

The meaning of the word “ambition” implies the desire of an individual to prove to himself that he is capable of more. This is synonymous with success, because the willingness to overcome obstacles and progressively move forward, regardless of the presence of favorable conditions, talents and talents, guarantees results in the form of approval from others, gaining self-confidence, and the effects of personal self-development.

American philosopher Christian D. Larson (Christian D. Larson) said: “If a person’s mind is dominated exclusively by ambition, he will not become great.” Excessive ambition clouds your thinking processes. To achieve the desired results, ambition must be combined with drive.

Aspiration causes the mind to imagine the wondrous possibilities within reach as we move forward. Ambition, disconnected from aspiration, is aimed at satisfying the personal needs of the individual, at his elevation in the eyes of others. An extraordinary mind combined with ambition leads to the fulfillment of any desires.

Healthy ambition is the ability to achieve more than others without harming yourself or others.

Realization of ambitions

Ambition in character motivates every individual to action. If they are not there, then you can lie on the couch and admire the successes of others. If there is ambition in a person’s character, then he sets goals for himself and does everything to get to them.

But it also happens that ambition is a negative character trait. We can talk about positivity if a person has reason to hope for the realization of his plans - education, personal growth, knowledge. If a person does not have the basis for forming and implementing plans, then ambitions are false. It's like a mirage in the desert, it builds on the sand and disappears just as well. To understand how this is, we suggest studying a specific example.

“This was in the late 80s. The two girls were close friends. Natalya and Zhanna were the same age, but they studied in different classes. So, Zhanna always studied well and dreamed of going to medical school. Natalya, on the contrary, was sickly, studied with C grades, but her plans also had an element of grandiosity. She loved languages and dreamed of entering the faculty of foreign languages or journalism.

Both graduated from school and began to prepare for admission. Zhanna studied non-stop, and Natalya didn’t seem to miss days of preparation. But then came the admission, and one managed to pass the exams and become a student, but the other did not. It’s just that Natasha’s plans were based on “mirages”. She did not have the appropriate knowledge and naturally failed the exams.

Years passed, one of the friends, as expected, graduated from university and began working as a doctor. And the second one got married and for a long time did not think about getting an education. Only after family troubles, left alone with the child, Natalya decided to try her luck again. She began to prepare to enter the university at the Faculty of Law.

She studied in the correspondence department, each time she had to pay extra for taking tests and exams. As a result, she still received a diploma. But why does she need it for someone who does not have clear, adequate ambitions to achieve success in the legal field? Surely many people guessed that Natasha hid the diploma in the chest of drawers and never thought about it again.”

We studied a banal, but very instructive story, Natasha seemed to have ambitions, but did not have the desire or determination to achieve results and work on them. They were false.

Is it good to be an ambitious person?

It's difficult to say for sure. What do you mean by ambition in a person? If it is the ability to confidently go towards achieving goals, there is nothing wrong with it. If this is arrogance, pride and arrogance, it’s worth thinking about.

In general, being ambitious is a good thing. After all, a person is constantly developing and moving forward. The problem arises when there is ambition, but the person remains stagnant.

The ideal option is that a person wants and knows how to get what he wants. This is the golden mean. There are also 2 extremes. The first is those who believe that nothing will work out. The second is inflated, naked ambitions. A person sets obviously unattainable goals and, of course, fails.

Is it possible to fight ambitions?

If a person’s ambitions interfere with his life or create discomfort for those around him, it makes sense to fight them. But there is one But! This is the same as in the case of an alcoholic or drug addict. It is impossible to fix a problem unless the person suffering from the “problem” wants it. If he has not admitted that his ambitions are harmful, then there is no point in doing anything.

In the case where there is agreement, you need to start by analyzing your actions and activities. It is important to identify positive and negative character traits. To do this, you should take a piece of blank paper and write down on it all the bad things that you notice about yourself. And every time fight the negative quality. Of course, it is impossible to improve immediately. But time is on your side - keep fighting and you will succeed.

You need to learn to respond normally to criticism from those who truly treat you with respect and love. There is no need to see a catch, betrayal, deceit in everything. Only people who truly love you can tell the truth. And your ill-wishers, observing your baseless ambition, happily rub their hands.
If you have a desire to realize your ambitions, pay attention to how adequate they are, whether they correspond to your internal and external potential. If yes, continue, and there is no need to fight it; if you don’t have the opportunity, refuse and don’t make people laugh. Communication with loved ones will help with this. Listen to their assessment of your activities and advice. It is not necessary to do everything, but it is still necessary to weigh the pros and cons of a particular task.

Definition of the concept and classification

Nowadays, ambition is seen as a strong need to act, to go towards a goal, to success, to strive for prosperity. When wondering what ambition is, you need to understand that there is no single definition. However, they all have the same meaning - to get what you want in any available way.

An ambitious person is a person who has no doubts about achieving success; there is confidence that he will be able to easily cope with any task. Such a person does not know the words “impossible”, “I can’t”, “it won’t work out”. He confidently says that he is capable of achieving any goal. The only difference is how much effort he will need to achieve the result. There are also the following definitions of an ambitious person:

an individual for whom his superiority is not so important as his ability to prove to everyone that he can achieve a lot; a person who sets goals and successfully achieves them; an individual who can make a certain amount of self-sacrifice in order to prove to everyone that he can achieve what he wants; a successful, strong-willed person who achieves a lot in life is an accomplished person.

People around them see arrogance and selfishness in the character of ambitious people. However, these qualities are more typical of individuals with high ambitions.

Some people admire the ambition of others, especially their desire to achieve their goals and overcome all obstacles. People try to be like them, develop ambitions, and strengthen them. However, there are also individuals who do not consider ambitious individuals to be normal people, do not strive to be such people, and are confident that they can achieve considerable heights if they perform their standard functions.

I bring to your attention examples of ambitions:

a girl from a village comes to the metropolis in order to break out of her backwoods and achieve great heights;
a guy who entered acting, strives to become a famous actor;
a girl who has set herself the goal of seducing a rich guy does everything in order to get him.

Ambitions include:

destructive and healthy;
imperial and political;
adequate and overestimated;
careerist and champion.

There are big and small ambitions:

major goals and plans - situations when a person sets very high standards for himself, for example, dreams of becoming the director of the company in which he currently works as a courier;
small ones are mainly formed due to low self-esteem - a person does not see his merits and deliberately underestimates his status. For example, a situation where an individual is an excellent specialist, they want to give him a promotion, but he refuses, as he considers himself unworthy of the new position.

Every person has some level of ambition, some don’t show it at all, some have it too high. It all depends on the specific abilities and capabilities of the individual.

Low ambitions. Such individuals very rarely manage to achieve good results and be successful. As a rule, these are shy, modest, insecure people. They have practically no desire to achieve anything, to strive for something. Such a person will rejoice in what he has. Difficulties that arise along his way will be frustrating, and he will try to avoid them.
Adequate. Synonyms for such ambition are ambition and arrogance. Such a person strives for heights, however, sets goals that are quite achievable. This individual is able to adequately assess his capabilities. When such a person completes a given task, he does not stop there, sets new goals for himself, and tries to conquer them. Having healthy ambitions in a person contributes to self-improvement. These individuals are interesting conversationalists, it is pleasant to communicate with them, they are good listeners, listen to what others say, and do not impose themselves. A person with this level of ambition will prove to himself the validity of his image, but will not demonstrate himself by pointing out his own superiority.
Elevated. Such a person is overly self-confident, often exaggerates his capabilities, does not know how to adequately assess his own abilities, rarely completes assigned tasks, and often does not finish what he starts. When something doesn't work out, he blames others or external factors, but not himself. In the team, such people are not taken seriously; they are not assigned important tasks. Unhealthy self-esteem of these personalities pushes people away; it causes problems with communication and loneliness.

How ambitions arise

Most believe that ambition is an inherited quality. This opinion has a right to life, because it is not based on nothing. Notice who is the ambitious person? Often this is the son or daughter of successful people who have reached great heights. Or the offspring of talkers, braggarts, greedy people and stingy people who raised their children in the same way. But if you dig deeper, you cannot call ambition a hereditary trait.

Everything is formed during childhood and for this reason children are similar to their parents. It is adults who can instill in a child high, low, or adequate ambitions. For example, parents are dentists who understand that for a career as a dentist it is necessary to study well, graduate from medical school, and constantly improve. They teach the child hard work. From an early age he attends various clubs and sections, is involved in exact sciences, sports, etc.

In the case when the children in the family are not interested in anything, but only do what they dream of a successful career in some industry, nothing will be achieved. Their ambitions are too high. And finally, despite the fact that their beloved child does well at school, gets good grades, and attends sports clubs, the parents claim that he will not achieve anything. This is a perfect example of understated ambition. She is raised as a child by his parents - pessimists, whiners and losers. The saying “water does not flow under a lying stone” applies here more than ever!

Ambitions are often the product of unfounded admiration for the child’s actions. It happens like this - a child picks up a candy wrapper from the floor - and the whole family is simply delighted with a normal act. Then he was able to turn on the TV himself - “wow, what a great guy!” Then there are performances in kindergarten, school, and from each such moment the relatives lose consciousness, what an event! That is, ordinary actions cause a violent reaction, based on nothing. The baby gets used to easy successes and develops ambitions. With age, the child's aspirations grow in accordance with the growth of needs.

Fortunately, there are many exceptional moments when a child who grew up in a family with inadequate development of ambitions is able to achieve a lot. This especially happens to those who have constantly heard that they will not be able to achieve success. But here it’s not – “I can do it!” “Why am I worse than others!” He challenges society and proves that everything is achievable, the main thing is to fight against low ambitions. And go towards your intended goal without stopping and without doubting your abilities.

How to know if you are ambitious

The word “ambitious person” means that an individual strives to be better, braver, stronger, kinder. On the other hand, the expression “ambitious girl” can often be heard in relation to a representative of the fair sex with exorbitant ambition, who does not accept compromises and does not make concessions, no matter how right she is.

An adequate, ambitious girl will make a lot of effort to be the first in school (at work), to win thematic Olympiads and sports competitions, this means that ambition is a useful character trait if it manifests itself in moderation and is inherent in people with high moral qualities. The following test questions will help you understand that you are a person with ambitions:

Would you like to change anything about yourself?
In your childhood dreams did you see yourself as a great man?
Would you like to know information that is intended exclusively for a select few?
Could you replace your boss in the workplace?
Do you like to hear praise for your success?
Do you know how to set goals and follow them?
Do you imagine your future, do you know what you want to achieve and who you want to become?
Are you willing to do anything to be noticed?
Are you attracted to being in the spotlight?

If you answered yes to most of the questions, then you are no stranger to ambition. How much they help or hinder you in your life will have to be sorted out individually. If you direct ambition in the right direction, it will become an advantage, help you realize your worth, develop your abilities, make a successful career, and become happy in your personal life.

Modern ambitions – what they look like

Experienced psychology experts say that ambition today is the main way to achieve positive results in life. Ambitiousness has become a fashionable character trait, otherwise you “can’t survive” in our world. We kindly ask readers not to confuse the ambition of modern man with greed and cynicism.

Let's think, with such competition, a huge number of applicants for a good job and salary, is it possible to “survive” without ambition? No, perhaps somewhere on the outskirts of the country, with no prospects for the future. But as we already know, they must be healthy and adequate. And the formation of aspirations is influenced by such qualities as a person’s self-esteem, heredity, training and personal aspects.

Self-esteem is very closely related to the aspirations of an individual. Those who have it too high have an inflated type of ambition. And with low self-esteem, you shouldn’t count on more than low claims. And of course, an adequate level of self-esteem is a healthy aspiration.
Family. In some homes, the main word when raising a child is “should”! Hearing it from childhood, the child grows up to be someone who must meet the desires and expectations of adults.
Personal factors - we are all divided into two types of people - introverts and extroverts. The first ones are closed, do not make contact and live in their own world. The latter, on the contrary, have a high level of communication, easily get to know and make friends with people. And of course, these qualities influence ambition. And what is noteworthy is that introverts often have inflated aspirations. And extroverts try to please everyone and everything and are not able to achieve much due to a low degree of ambition.

A little Yandex Music:

Types and features of formation

Ambitions can be normal, justified, or, on the contrary, inflated and unreasonable, which predominates in the character of the individual, depends only on him. An overly ambitious person underestimates the merits of others, does not try to understand the opinions and problems of others, extols his smallest merits as if they were outstanding, extraordinary talents.

Healthy ambition is an incentive for self-improvement, a desire to improve one’s life, the life of loved ones and the whole society. Professional and family ambitions are distinguished depending on the scope of application of this character trait. Ambition is a category in psychology that is subject to development, which determines the presence of stimulating factors:

Level of self-esteem. People with high self-esteem tend to be ambitious. How justified it is depends on the adequacy of your assessment of your abilities.
Personality type. Extroverts prioritize communication with others; public assessment of actions and subsequent recognition of talents and merits are important to them. Introverts abstract themselves from the public; their mood and well-being do not depend on the opinion that others have about them. In the first case, ambition is a constant companion of the personality, which is fueled by such emotions as encouragement and approval of the crowd, which is a catalyst for subsequent reactions. Under the influence of current praise and exaltation, in anticipation of the upcoming favor of the public, extroverts are able to perform incredibly difficult tasks to the limit of human capabilities. Examples: record-breaking athletes, great military leaders, people included in the Guinness Book of Records.
Social environment. A child who observes the achievements of his parents, acquaintances, and relatives subconsciously develops attitudes towards a similar model of behavior. Parents who have succeeded in politics, commerce, art, and other areas of life expect similar results from their child, encourage the manifestation of ambition in him, stimulate him (materially, verbally) to activities aimed at a similar result.

The formed behavior model in some aspects helps the child develop, but in others it slows down his communication skills. It often becomes more difficult for him to meet people, communicate in a new team, and make friends.

Reasons for inflated ambitions

As a rule, many mental disorders begin in childhood. The family environment has a very strong influence.

For example, if a girl was told throughout her childhood and adolescence that she was a princess and deserved only a prince, or, in extreme cases, a foreign billionaire, then having absorbed this “bright thought” the girl will carry it throughout her life. And now, she is already forty years old, and she is still lonely and deeply unhappy, because none of the men she met along the path of life met her expectations. Of course, this example is a little exaggerated, but it fully describes the process of formation of this syndrome of inflated expectations.

Also, high ambitions are the influence of accumulated and inveterate complexes, which again comes from childhood. If a person had a strong complex about something at an early age or experienced problems communicating with family and peers, then with an inflated level of aspirations in the future he will try to make up for his internal inferiority.

Pros and cons of ambition

Ambition, like any phenomenon in the world, has extremes. That is, it can be both useful and poison a person’s life. Let's consider both poles in more detail.

For example, if someone wants:

get a good education;
open a personal business or become an actor, producer, deputy, etc.;
marry the most wonderful girl;
have a comfortable home;
drive a modern car;
vacationing with your family in warm countries twice a year - all this is normal and quite feasible.

We have an instinct for survival and it would be foolish not to strive for the most comfortable living conditions.

After all, if you set unrealistic goals for yourself, then the inability to achieve them will lead the individual to great mental suffering. In the worst case, madness.

Examples of inflated ambitions:

if you marry, then definitely to Madonna;
if to be anyone, then only the president and no less;
if you get an education, then only Oxford;
if you have a home, then only in the Kremlin;
cars? Last century! I want to travel on a personal starship;
rest 363 days a year. Well, okay, 362 will do too.

The contents of the list are deliberately exaggerated (how is that?) for a better understanding that ambition is sometimes a direct road to neurosis or a madhouse.

Moreover, not only the person himself, but also those around him can suffer from high standards. For example, if you marry such a man, you can live with him for the rest of your life in anger and resentment, because your spouse will remind you every day that you are not Madonna and, in general, “didn’t come out with a snout.” Or a woman who waits for Prince Harry to get divorced and come for her on a white horse risks remaining an old maid and spending her life alone.

And the most interesting thing is that he is satisfied with this state of affairs, because his motivational sphere is “asleep”, and personal responsibility, as a rule, is in the wrong hands.

The conclusion to this chapter is well served by folk wisdom - “Everything is good, but in moderation!” You need to understand that everything (including ambition) has a golden mean: only from this position can you look at the world realistically and not become a victim of perfectionism.

Ambition is not just about money

“Yes, of course, he is a doctor from God, golden hands... but this is of no use.
He disappears at work until the night, and brings home pennies. He also spends it either on books or at conferences.” Our claims and aspirations can be aimed at anything, anything that might interest us - career growth or jewelry craftsmanship in the profession, education, creativity, hobbies, relationships and family. Everything we want to invest energy in, develop and improve. Or we don't want to. The quality of our life, the depth and development of our personality, and the level of self-satisfaction depend on our ambitions. It seems to me that it is in vain to consider these properties in evaluative categories. Being content with little or striving for more is neither good nor bad. The main thing is knowledge about yourself and your partner or the requirements for him.

I like the metaphor of grasses, bushes and trees. A blade of grass will not grow as tall as a tree, and if a tree is not allowed to grow taller than a bush, it may die. And is each of them bad in itself? Worse or better than others? No. They are just different and each in its place.

Author Daria Laponova

The influence of ambitions on life spheres

It is very important to objectively determine the role of ambition: what it means and how it affects different areas of a person’s life.

Professional activity. In the modern world, it is impossible to achieve professional success without a reasonable amount of ambition. A person should strive to study, hone his skills, and gain experience. It depends on this whether he will become a good master of his craft or will be content with odd jobs for the rest of his life.
Career. You can’t do without ambition in this area. The material well-being of not only the person himself, but also all the people dear to him directly depends on career growth. And financial independence determines the status of an individual in society.
Family. Family life is precisely the area in which the ambition of one or both spouses can be destructive. Arrogance, self-centeredness and lack of compromise can kill even the strongest feelings. Only common healthy ambitions of partners are allowed, who together strive to achieve their goals and do not give in to difficulties.
Children. Parents often make a huge mistake in raising their children when they try to realize their own ambitions in them. This means that a distorted idea of the surrounding reality is formed in the child’s character. The baby must grow up to be a self-sufficient person with his own big or small achievements. Parents are obliged to help him in this choice, and not make him a hostage to their desires.