Details Category: Articles on psychiatry
Psychopaths are people who prey on other people. These are “wolves in sheep’s clothing” who gradually suck your self-esteem, strength and resources out of you, and then do the same to others - endlessly, until death.
It is very difficult to be completely sure that the person you are dealing with is truly a psychopath.
Because in everyday life we are accustomed to calling sociopaths psychopaths, as well as people with narcissistic or antisocial personality disorders, excitable hysterics, people with asthenic disorders, and some others. Diagnosis of such a plan can be difficult. Why? Because you are most likely a sincere and kind person who believes that other people are good too. It can be extremely difficult to accept the idea that the person you trusted is not really who he seems.
Dealing with a psychopath
You must maintain inner strength and honor. Accept the fact that this is a psychopath in front of you, and be prepared for what awaits you ahead. Please don't confuse a psychopath with a serial killer. Without a doubt, the vast majority of articles in newspapers and magazines, as well as television programs, are devoted to psychopathic serial killers. However, severe cases occur at a rate of approximately one in 30,000. Most psychopaths prefer to live undetected.
No contacts
The most important thing you must understand is that you must stop any contact with the psychopath. It's easy to say, but much more difficult to do. Of course, the difficulty of breaking up with a psychopath directly depends on how seriously you got stuck in the relationship. If your romance was fleeting, the breakup will happen almost painlessly. If you have an affair with a business partner, breaking up will require a tougher position on your part. Deciding to stop contacting a psychopath is only the first step, and it won't be worth a dime unless you take effective steps to actually reduce any means of communication and interaction with this human predator.
Keep your decision a secret
Use stealth technology. This means that you must be very careful and keep your plan to end your relationship with a psychopath a deep secret. Do not try to confront or influence a psychopath with a group of people. This will have long-term unpleasant consequences for you.
You may feel like you have to warn others that this person next to you is a psychopath... for the love of God, don't do it! The sad truth is that psychopaths have a brilliant ability to juggle facts and carry out masterful counterattacks, and the target of these counterattacks is your weaknesses and shortcomings. A sudden counterattack will leave you wondering: “What happened? Why am I being attacked? What happened is that you are a good guy who wanted others not to be hurt the same way as you. Have you tried to open the eyes of those around you? Congratulations, now everyone sees that you are actually very bad.
Self-destruction
Can psychopaths be afraid? Severe psychopathy is a high risk for self-aggression to be as great as aggression toward others (WHJM, unpublished data). A significant number of psychopaths die violently within a relatively short period of time after their discharge from forensic psychiatric facilities as a result of their own behavior (for example, as a result of risky driving or involvement in dangerous situations) (Black et al., 1996; Martens, 1997). Psychopaths may feel that all life, including their own, is worthless (Martens, 1997; Palermo and Martens, in press).
Organize your support
Because you will need it. You should find a professional - a psychologist, lawyer or doctor - who has experience dealing with psychopaths. You will need someone who will be on your side, helping you maintain mental and physical health, because if the psychopath is not willing to let you go in peace, really ugly things will happen. You may think that your friends will be a good source of support for you...it will be a complete surprise to you that if your psychopath saw this coming, he or she may have already worked with your friends, spreading false stories about you, so that the time you contact them... they will be sure that of the two of you, it is you who is the psychopath (although, of course, they will be afraid to tell you about it to your face). So your friends, of course, can be the best support system... unless your psychopath has already worked with them and released a dose of poison towards you.
Protect yourself
Protect your assets. Psychopaths completely drain their victims, and this is not only about the emotional state, but also about everything else that you have, including money, power, social status or reputation, as well as any other property. If a psychopath sees you as a threat to his prosperous existence and an obstacle to manipulating other people, he will strive to destroy you and will watch with ecstasy as you lose everything step by step. And the point here is not that he or she wants to take over your things or status; they are simply obsessed with the desire to see you completely destroyed and stripped of everything you had. They demand that you pay exactly this price for not allowing yourself to be persecuted anymore. Don't let them take everything from you. Do what you can to save at least something of what you have... of course, if it is not too late.
If you want to save your job, contact your boss and let them know that you are in a relationship with a vindictive and lying psychopath, and that you are taking steps to get out of this relationship and cut off all ties. This is a true preventative measure, because the psychopath will try to deprive you of your job. This is the usual revenge of a psychopath, which is always expressed in such an attack. If management is warned about this, they will be less likely to believe new information that begins to appear to them. For example, that you received bribes at work, engaged in theft, used or sold drugs, spread rumors discrediting your superiors, shared confidential information about the company with competitors, and so on, and so on. Regardless of the specific content, all stories of this kind will sound very plausible (down to the smallest detail) and will be aimed at discrediting and firing you.
As soon as the psychopath begins to understand that you are avoiding him, not communicating and not spending time with him, if he feels that it has become more difficult to manipulate you, he will certainly begin (if he has not already started) to throw mud at you; especially if he understands that you suspect that he is a psychopath. Sometimes - and such cases are quite rare, when if your relationship for a short time was limited to only light flirting and did not have time to develop deeper - a psychopath may not see you as a threat to continue manipulating other people, and therefore will allow you to simply disappear from his life and eventually just let it go.
Emotional pain and abuse
Social isolation, loneliness, and associated emotional pain may precede serious criminal behavior in psychopaths (Martens, 2000, 1999, 1997; Palermo and Martens, in press). They believe that the whole world is against them and ultimately come to the conclusion that they deserve special privileges or rights to satisfy their desires. As psychopathic serial killers Jeffrey Dahmer and Dennis Nielsen have stated, severe psychopaths eventually reach a point where they feel they have severed their last tenuous connection with the normal world. Subsequently, their sadness and suffering increase, and their crimes become more and more sophisticated (Palermo and Martens, in press).
Dahmer and Nielsen stated that they killed “just to have company” (Palermo and Martens, in press). Both men had no friends, and their only social contacts were casual encounters in gay bars. Nielsen watched television and talked for hours with the corpses of the people he killed; Dahmer ate parts of the victims' bodies in order to become one with them: he believed that in this way his victims continued to live in his body.
For other people, it is unimaginable that these men were so lonely - although they describe their loneliness and social failures as unbearably painful. Each of them created their own sadistic universe to take revenge because the world rejected them, raped them, abused them, neglected them and made them suffer emotionally.
Dahmer and Nielsen claimed that they did not enjoy the killing act themselves. Dahmer attempted to create zombies out of his victims by injecting acid into their brains after stunning them with sleeping pills. He wanted complete control over his victims, but when he failed in this, he killed them. Nielsen felt much more comfortable with corpses than with living people - the dead could not abandon him. He wrote poems and spoke tender words to the corpses, using them for company as long as possible. In other severe psychopaths, a relationship has been found between the intensity of sadness and loneliness and the degree of violence, recklessness, and impulsivity (Martens, 1999, 1997; Palermo and Martens, in press).
Be steadfast like a rock
Be firm in your decision. Don't respond to a psychopath's counterattacks. If you want to communicate something to this person, it should sound quiet and firm - as if you are a rock. He or she must understand that he or she will not be able to manipulate you or cause you to respond with irritation or fear, regardless of what and how he says. You should maintain good posture: back straight, shoulders free, gaze calm, maintain a positive outlook, smile and exude self-confidence. Even if inside you are not sure of anything at all, on the outside you should look like a calm and firm person. Because any sign of your weakness will be instantly noticed and used against you: either as an opportunity to offer yourself to help, or as a reason to launch a new offensive.
Phase 5: Escalation
If the victims of a psychopath suddenly begin to ask questions about the discrepancy between his behavior and his words, they face “punishment.” At first, the psychopath categorically denies any inappropriate actions on his part and tries to go on the attack.
Usually a person becomes ashamed of his suspicions, and as a result he begins to doubt himself even more. If victims persist in expressing concern and suspicion, they are bound to fall under the hot hand of an angry psychopath.
Violence comes in many forms, the most common being psychological, emotional and physical. You can notice physical abuse (the most obvious) by bruises, contusions, cuts and similar signs. Often victims do not report physical aggression towards themselves, as is the case with domestic violence.
Family members, astute friends, or co-workers who notice his traces may try to intervene, but as a rule they are forced to remain aloof as the victim refuses their help.
Physical violence is dangerous because psychopaths, like other rapists, only get the hang of it over time. Be sure to ask for help!
Emotional and psychological abuse is much more difficult for an outsider to notice, although its consequences are devastating for the victim. It often manifests as anxiety, distress, depression, inability to sleep and generalized fear and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Psychological violence leads to decreased self-esteem, a feeling of insignificance, self-doubt and mental anguish. People exposed to it lose their sense of self. They believe that something is wrong with them.
In many cases, they tend to blame themselves for the violence committed against them. "What did I do wrong?" - they ask themselves. Because our thoughts and feelings influence our behavior, victims of abuse perform poorly at work; They are easily distracted, easily irritated, and become taciturn or overly emotional.
Psychopaths use psychological abuse to keep victims under control. Criticism (“You’re so fat! No one will love you but me!”), threats (“I won’t stand for this anymore! I’m leaving!”), and intimidation (“Don’t make me hurt you!”) are common tactics. in their arsenal, and, surprisingly, such a “struggle” only strengthens the psychopathic connection.
If you have been abused, immediately seek advice and help from others (friends, family members or trusted colleagues) or, depending on what happened to you, from law enforcement or social services.
Save your Reputation
Protect any positive reputation you have. Psychopaths have the unique ability to influence people's opinions of themselves and who is being manipulated. Try not to take it personally. I know it's hard to lose the support of friends, family, co-workers and perhaps society at large, but you can't blame people who succumb to the psychological spell that a psychopath weaves around the world like a spider.
A psychopath's overriding goal is to maintain his reputation. He needs to look like an innocent victim in the eyes of as many people as possible, and he has a tremendous track record of proving his impeccable reputation, no matter whose reputation suffers in the process.
Be prepared for the worst
A psychopath will use everything you said or did against you. Expect attacks, slander, slander, gossip, denials like “it was a long time ago” or “oh, it was a joke”; statements that he or she was upset, tired or deceived. These attacks can take countless possible forms. If you communicate via the Internet, please note that your social contacts are easy prey for psychopathic attacks. Friends on Facebook, followers on Twitter, friends and partners on linked-in or any other social networks are very easy prey, and a psychopath, without any embarrassment, will start a wide media campaign against you on social networks.
Document everything
Take photos, save screenshots, copy correspondence, save conversations as audio files. Keep printed copies of everything you can to document any interactions or statements made by your psychopath; Keep these documents in a safe place. Pay attention to what and how you say. Act as if your every word is being recorded and may be read at a future time by a jury or prosecutor, or may be taken out of context in an attempt to make you sound like you are crazy.
Perhaps someday the people who once trusted you will be able to see the truth, but even so, if your psychopath was a master of his craft, they still will not be able to fully trust you as they once did. Even after the essence of the psychopath is fully revealed to the public eye. So do not hold on to the false hope of one day refuting all the undeserved accusations to which you have been subjected. In most cases, the effects of such accusations are permanent, although they may lessen over time. So …
Advances in treatment
In the last decade, neurobiological explanations have become available for many of the personality traits of psychopaths. For example, impulsivity, recklessness/irresponsibility, hostility and aggressiveness may be determined by abnormal levels of neurochemicals including monoamine oxidase (MAO), serotonin (5-HT) and 5-hydroxyindoleacetic acid (5-HIAA), triiodothyronine (T3), free thyroxine (T4 ), testosterone, cortisol, adrenocorticotropic hormone (ACTH), and hormones of the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal and hypothalamic-pituitary-genital axis (WHJM, unpublished data). Other characteristics, such as sensation seeking and a failure to learn from experience (Lykken, 1995), may be associated with underactivation of the cerebral cortex (Martens, 2000, 1997; Zuckerman, 1994). Sensation seeking may also be associated with low levels of MAO and cortisol and high concentrations of gonadal hormones, as well as decreased prefrontal gray matter volume (Raine, 1996; Raine et al., 2000; Zuckerman, 1994). Many psychopaths can thus be considered, at least to some extent, to be victims of neurobiologically determined behavioral abnormalities, which in turn create a permanent gap between them and the rest of the world. It may be possible to reduce psychopathic traits such as sensation seeking, impulsivity, aggression, and associated emotional pain through psychotherapy, psychopharmacology, and/or neurofeedback therapy.
Long-term (at least five years) psychotherapy appears to be effective for some psychopaths because psychopathic personality traits may be reduced (Dolan, 1998; Dolan and Coid, 1993; Sanislow and McGlashan, 1998).
Psychotherapeutic treatment alone may not be enough to achieve improvement. Psychopharmacological treatments can help normalize neurobiological functioning and associated behavioral/personality traits (Martens, in press, 2001, 2000). Lithium has been impressive in the treatment of antisocial, hostile, and aggressive behavior (Bloom and Kupfer, 1994; Sheard et al., 1976; Tupin et al., 1973). Hollander (1999) found that mood stabilizers such as divalproex (Depakote), selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs) and antipsychotics have proven effective in treating aggression and affective instability in impulsive patients. To date, there have been no controlled studies of psychopharmacological treatments for other core psychopathic features.
Insufficient cortical activation and low autonomic activity-reactivity can be significantly reduced using adaptive neurofeedback techniques (Martens, 2001; Raine, 1996).
Norman (not his real name) was raised by his aunt because his parents were divorced and no one was interested or caring about him. As a child and teenager, he had numerous encounters with law enforcement agencies due to car thefts, theft, theft, fraud, and assault. Twice he was sent to reform school. When he turned 21, he was convicted of armed robbery and served a year and a half in prison. His only close friend was also a violent criminal; Norman had many short-term sexual relationships with various women. At the age of 29, he killed two strangers in a bar who insulted him and was sentenced to forensic psychiatric treatment. Norman was diagnosed with psychopathy according to the Hare Psychopathy Checklist (Hare et al., 1990).
Norman showed slight improvement over seven years of behavioral therapy, but became less and less motivated. The forensic psychiatric hospital considered him incurable and intended to abandon all attempts at treatment. Norman's lawyer insisted on a forensic neurological examination, which subsequently found that Norman suffered from severe deficits in cortical activation, disorders of serotonin and monoamine oxidase (5-HT and MAO) metabolism, and concentration problems.
Norman was prescribed d, l-fenfluramine (Pondimin), a drug that promotes the release of serotonin. (Fenfluramine was voluntarily withdrawn from the American market in 1997 - Ed.) With the use of therapeutic doses of the drug (0.2 mg/kg to 0.4 mg/kg), a significant dose-dependent decrease in impulsive and aggressive reactions began to occur. A month later, monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOI pargyline [Eutonyl], 10 mg/kg) and a course of psychodynamic psychotherapy were added to the treatment structure. Pargyline produced some normalization of his electroencephalogram (EEG) patterns, and the dose was then titrated to 20 mg/kg over five months. Neurofeedback therapy was started after two months and continued for the next 15 months. His EEG gradually returned to normal and his concentration and attention potential increased. Norman continued to receive d,l-fenfluramine and psychotherapy for two years, after which he was discharged from the court unit. He voluntarily continued psychotherapy for an additional three years and, in the four years since his release, he has not relapsed.
Forgive yourself
The main thing is to forgive yourself. You are not a criminal, you just became a victim. And as a victim, you may have seen yourself as vulnerable or in compromising circumstances, and you may have felt like a fool. But you are not a fool. Anyone can become a victim of an experienced psychopath, and this happens every day in all walks of life and in all walks of life.
You couldn't see it coming... but now that you know, you're less likely to fall victim again... and maybe you can help others see the signs - or at least be aware - that there are evil people, human wolves in sheep's clothing who seek to destroy the lives of other people without any remorse.
All materials on the site are presented for informational purposes only, approved by certified physician Mikhail Vasiliev, diploma series 064834, in accordance with license No. LO-77-005297 dated September 17, 2012, by a certified specialist in the field of psychiatry, certificate number 0177241425770.
