Most of us try not to express strong feelings in public—for example, at work. Exceptions are cases when a person unexpectedly learns about the grief that has befallen him. And, of course, there are simply unbalanced people for whom rage or tears are perhaps the first reaction to events. How to communicate with such difficult people?
Problem Details
During a hysteria, the main thing is to understand how to calm down and relieve symptoms. Hysteria or a nervous breakdown is always accompanied by a storm of emotions. Human:
- gesticulates;
- cries;
- screams;
- tries to blame people nearby for his problems.
At the peak of tension, tremors of the limbs, lips, chin, seizures, confusion, temporary blindness and deafness may occur. Occurs at any age. The reason is the accumulation of negative emotions over a long period of time, nervous and physical exhaustion.
Hysteria always appears at the moment when there is a person nearby who will be a random spectator of an uncontrolled process.
Almost 8% of the population is susceptible to a disease such as hysteria. A severe form is hysterical psychopathy. Initial symptoms appear in childhood. During a nervous breakdown, the child falls to the floor, arches, screams loudly, and does not respond to treatment. The behavioral reaction is not feigned, it manifests itself spontaneously. If you have such signs, you should contact a neurologist.
Hysterical neurosis is a violent emotional reaction as a result of a lack of attention, conflicting demands between what a person can do and what society requires of him.
Household hysteria is a quality of character and is feigned.
A hysterical performance is designed for a specific person and is a method of manipulation. In such cases, the person at whom aggression is directed must ignore all attacks, otherwise he will turn into a victim.
Causes
When examining the causes of children's tantrums, most psychologists agree that the most common are the following:
"Pay attention to me!"
In the modern world, mothers make high demands on themselves and place too much responsibility on themselves: every day they need to complete a number of household chores, have time to work as a freelancer, pay attention to their husbands, take time for themselves... In such a series of events, mothers quite often try to find an independent activity for a child.
Sooner or later, the child realizes that he is “standing in line” for his mother’s attention. Of course, this state of affairs does not suit him and then he unleashes a series of unreasonable, from the mother’s point of view, hysterics. In the manifestation of such hysterics, one can read his words: “Remember me! I'm here! I want your love, care and attention!”
"What if…"
Often, with his hysterics, a child tests the boundaries of what is permitted. Through trial and error, he understands: what is possible and what is not, where is good and where is evil. Through probing the boundaries, knowledge of the world occurs. This is fine. This process is a natural component of the interaction between parent and child.
“I can’t, no way!”
The inability to restrain negative emotions and cope with them independently in the process of acquiring new skills is one of the main reasons for children's tantrums. The child wants to get the final, final result of his actions of some nature as quickly as possible (sculpting a certain figure, cutting out a circle, drawing a tree) and if there is no such result, be hysterical! You must understand that at such moments he is really very upset and this problem covers all the thoughts and feelings of the little person.
“Today you can, tomorrow not!”
In cases where parental behavior is inconsistent, when there is no clear and understandable system of restrictions, the child is at a loss and does not understand how to behave. He cannot choose the right landmark. In such situations, hysteria becomes the child’s ally and helps him.
"I'm tired"
If a child is planning a difficult and eventful day (lots of outdoor games, holidays and birthdays, long trips), the risk of hysterics at the end of such a day is very high.
“It hurts me! And give me something to drink!”
Any physical discomfort such as hunger, thirst, pain can cause a child to become hysterical.
"When there is too much love!"
When parents do not see boundaries in their care for the child, and smother the child with their love and care, children begin to resist this. And the main weapon in this battle for the child becomes hysteria. This is especially evident during crisis periods of age.
Respect your child's personal boundaries! With the “Where are my children” application, you will always know where your child is and what is happening with him, without unnecessary calls and SMS.
Getting rid of hysteria
Treatment of hysteria is carried out with the help of drugs and psychocorrection. It is necessary to distinguish it from epilepsy. The easiest way is to observe the patient's behavior in individual cases. During a hysterical attack, a person falls to the floor so as not to hurt himself, and with epilepsy, patients are often injured by falling to the floor, because they cannot control themselves and their body.
A hysterical attack is not accompanied by foaming from the mouth, voluntary defecation, urination, or biting the tongue. After a tantrum, a person can return to normal activities. After an epileptic seizure, the patient falls asleep and feels exhausted.
A psychiatrist treats painful (not feigned) hysteria.
Healing involves:
- auto-trainings;
- taking psychotropic medications: depending on the intensity of the manifestations, mild sedatives or tranquilizers, antidepressants are prescribed;
- procedures that enhance immunity.
The main task of the immediate environment is to behave with restraint towards the patient and try to support. It is important to stop all provoking factors and help a person perceive stalemate situations with more restraint, without damaging the psyche.
Sometimes the hysteria goes far and lasts for more than an hour. What to do in such situations?
Start asking distracting simple questions, the person will begin to answer them little by little, turn on logical thinking and, thereby, reduce his emotional outburst. This quickly relieves affective tension and leads to a sober assessment of the situation.
With prolonged hysteria, which can last for hours and almost lead to physical fainting, it is sometimes necessary to use extreme measures.
In such cases, you can try to bring the person back to his senses in a harsh way - slap him in the face, sharply pull him by the arm, or do something similar. It will be a bit of a shock to him, but it will help distract him from the state in which he is so deeply immersed. This will bring the person “to the surface” for a while and help regain self-control.
This is where it is necessary to force a person to talk about his condition, problem, situation in which he finds himself. Next, support, as described above, and help find a solution to the problem or a way out of the current situation.
Sometimes a person reaches a dead end and begins to struggle from powerlessness, not finding a way out. But another person’s “outside view” can easily find it. Give the person a hint or share your speculations about this, and then the interlocutor will be able to handle it himself.
Stopping hysterics in adults
How to stop an adult's tantrum:
- give me some water to drink;
- make you wash with cold water;
- give the person the opportunity to get rid of emotions;
- listen, but do not force them to talk about problems;
- do not say that all a person’s experiences are not important, do not ask them to calm down;
- try to touch the person more, hug him, this will make the patient feel safe, focus on the situation;
- put the person to bed when the emotional crisis subsides;
- drop valerian and allow the patient to fall asleep if he makes contact.
Having become a voluntary or involuntary witness to a nervous breakdown, assess your condition. Make sure you can patiently bear all the accusations, complaints, screaming and fits. If you are not confident in your abilities, it is better to refuse the idea of helping a person.
What to do after a tantrum?
Most people feel empty and confused after an emotional outburst. “When they regain consciousness,” they often have difficulty understanding what they have done. Many do not remember what they did and how they behaved at this time.
When the hysteria ends, do not be outraged by the person’s behavior, do not remind him of what happened. If necessary, give him a sedative - hawthorn infusion or a few drops of motherwort tincture. You can give him warm tea. And after that go to bed.
Polina Nikitina
Help with a hysterical attack
Severe hysteria can provoke a fainting state. A person under the influence of his emotions does not hear those around him. First aid for hysterics is:
- use ammonia;
- sprinkle cold water on your face;
- try to give the patient privacy.
First aid to stop a hysterical attack involves abruptly removing a person from a state of prostration, when he does not hear or see anything around him, but is concentrated only on his own emotions. This can be done with any sudden movement or sound. Use short phrases when communicating. Upon completion of the attack, a rollback effect begins, which is accompanied by drowsiness and inhibition of reactions. After a hysterical attack, a person may begin to clean the apartment and continue vigorous activity for several hours. Don't touch it in this state. The body itself is looking for ways to release energy; if you pester the patient with questions and offer to talk, this will provoke a new breakdown.
You need to gradually bring a person out of hysteria.
As soon as the energy runs out, the person needs to be given the opportunity to sleep. Do not relieve symptoms with alcohol. Do not support the patient's inappropriate actions, but also do not insist that he is wrong. Try not to point out to a person his inadequacy. It is important that those around you understand that in the current circumstances such a reaction is the norm. You can talk to the patient only after he has had enough sleep and will adequately perceive the information provided.
Frequently repeated attacks require medication and correctional psychological treatment.
It is recommended to stop hysterics of an everyday nature, that is, feigned ones, by indifference on the part of the listener. The fewer witnesses to such manipulations, the faster they will end. A clear example of this behavior can be seen in children who throw a tantrum on the street or in a store, demanding a toy, chocolate, etc. The more strangers there are around the child, the stronger the hysterical attack.
Eternal teenagers
Medicine cannot yet say anything definite about the causes of such mental disorders. The only consolation is that they are quite rare. But what the mass stereotypes are right about is that women most often suffer from hysterical neurosis. According to statistics, for every 10 hysterical women there is one hysterical man. It is not for nothing that the word “hysteria” itself comes from the Greek “uterus”. Hippocrates saw the cause of the disease in the fact that the uterus begins to “wander” around the body, causing the reactions described above. And only in the Middle Ages, when similar attacks were described in men, it became clear that the problem was not in the uterus, but in the head. In the case of hysteria, a painfully vivid desire to be in the center of attention, egocentrism, comes to the fore. It is no coincidence that psychiatrists classify this type of character as adolescent, juvenile unstable. In fact, such people are eternal teenagers. According to Professor Ostroglazov, the egocentrism of such people is often combined with spiritual coldness towards everyone who does not put him, his beloved, at the center of the universe, with the need to be a hypocrite, to weave intrigue in order to make events revolve around him. For an eternal teenager, it is first of all important that they talk about him, that they tinker with him, and he is ready to attract attention to himself by any means necessary. Either he dresses up in loud, bright clothes, or, on the contrary, he makes people talk about an old patched skirt. Even in illness, hysterics tend to show off. And all this is just to attract the attention of others, either with admiration or pity. The hysteric pays for inattention to himself with hostility. But it’s not difficult to make peace with him: it’s enough to praise him for something, and he’s ready to forget all the insults. Often people of this type of character strive for leadership positions. And the real hindrance to business is when a hysteric becomes a boss. Concerned about applause from his own subordinates, such a leader secretly tries to set those he doesn’t like against each other, weaves intrigues and cares least of all about the matter at hand.
Self-calming
If hysteria does occur, you need to follow simple steps:
- recognize the fact that hysteria has begun and it is inevitable in this situation, try to express it out loud to yourself or to those around you;
- throw out your emotions, try to be alone at this moment;
- scream, hit a punching bag, do squats, tear paper;
- do not restrain yourself even after 30 minutes. you will see how the emotional outburst will subside;
- restore strength using any method convenient for you;
- analyze your behavior and the reasons that provoked it;
- try to eliminate the reasons as much as possible or adjust your attitude to certain factors.
If it happens frequently, go to see a neurologist. The doctor will explain in detail how to calm down in a stalemate and help change your attitude towards the stress factor. It may be that the reasons for the behavioral reaction developed in childhood. Such problems are solved with the help of anchoring on positive aspects, meditation, affirmations and other methods of suggestion.
Hysteria of children at different age periods
Some children may experience tantrums even at the age of nine months, but most often the onset of children's hysterics occurs when the child is one and a half years old. Due to his age, the baby is unable to control his emotions. His speech is not yet developed at the proper level in order to express and explain his thoughts, feelings, and desires.
At 2 years old, a child often resorts to tantrums to attract the attention of adults. In doing so, he uses:
- screams;
- lying and rolling on the floor (especially in crowded places);
- stubbornness.
This behavior is quite natural, since the emotional system of a child of this age has not yet matured.
We can observe especially vivid attacks of hysterics in three-year-olds. During this special, crisis period, hysterics are expressed in completely different ways, but they are united by strong stubbornness, negativism and strong self-will.
At this age, the child does not have the ability to compromise. The method of manipulation is mastered. If a three-year-old managed to manipulate his parents with hysteria once, then in the future he will actively use this tactic.
As the child grows up, his knowledge of the world around him expands, and he no longer feels the urgent need to resort to hysterics. By the age of four, communication skills are quite well developed, and the child increasingly chooses the “eco-friendly” - verbal way to tell the parent about his feelings and desires.
If hysterics continue after four years, this is a serious reason to reconsider the education system and seek help from specialists.
Treatment of hysterical neurosis
Psychocorrection and strengthening of the nervous system will help cure hysterical neurosis. At psychotherapy appointments, the doctor does not pay much attention to complaints, otherwise seizures will become more frequent. The goal of treatment is to correct the perception of oneself and one’s place in society, to find and eliminate the root causes.
Drug treatment boils down to taking general strengthening drugs. Increased excitability requires treatment with plant-based sedatives. “Valerian”, “Motherwort”, “Persen”, “Hawthorn” are suitable. Tranquilizers help quickly calm a person who is hysterical. They are used in particularly difficult cases, for example, when a person has suffered a significant loss (a loved one has died, witnessed an emergency, etc.).
To restore normal activity of the nervous system, vitamin complexes and nootropic drugs containing active acids necessary for the construction of nerve cells are indicated.
Water massage for healing
To treat hysteria, treatment with water jets was introduced; relieving tension through water jets of a certain power turned out to be productive. This is how a method of treating hysteria in women and men with water massage appeared.
Treatment of hysteria with water massage involves a fairly intense effect on the entire body, bordering on pain. Today such procedures are rarely used. The patient can independently perform a shower massage for relaxation or take baths with herbal infusions. Before taking a shower, it is advisable to scrub your body. It relaxes muscles well and invigorates a contrast shower, especially after physical activity.
Treatment methods have been refined and modernized. When the functioning of the central nervous system is impaired, the muscles of the collar zone, spine, and limbs spasm; exposure to water helps relieve cramps. It is important to be careful, such a massage involves sadistic actions that cause pain, this can provoke more serious deviations.
How to avoid hysteria?
Dealing with tantrums can be quite difficult. It is advisable, of course, not to allow their manifestations and to prevent them, rather than to get out of them.
There are many tricks and ways that can help:
You should not provoke your baby into similar situations. It would be better to remove dangerous and prohibited items from sight.
Remember that the abundance of prohibitions in the life of a little explorer hinder his development. If he pulls on sharp scissors, replace them with safety ones. Give him the opportunity to understand in your presence how to use them correctly.
If you know that you won’t be able to walk past the toy store without conflict, it is advisable to choose a different road and go around on the other side.
Do not categorically refuse your baby’s favorite activities. You can simply put them off delicately: “Come on, we’ll go for a walk, and when we get back, we’ll watch a cartoon.”
If you still reject his desire, be sure to explain the reason: “You can’t take this toy because it’s someone else’s. You can play this one.”
Warn your child in advance about your plans. Give him plenty of time to finish the game, to finish his business: “Come on, you finish your beautiful sand tower, and then we’ll go home!”
If the little one doesn’t want to leave the walk without crying, come up with a game for him - a journey.
Offer him:
- Do not go home, but ride a stroller or bicycle in the direction of home.
- Do not return to the apartment to eat, but go up to your floor with the opportunity to press the desired button in the elevator.
- Do not wash dirty hands from the street, but say hello with soap and stroke it.
Then the baby will follow you with curiosity, waiting for a new exciting game.
If you see that hysteria is inevitable, switch the baby’s attention to a comical situation you have imagined, cheer him up by lightly tickling him.
Distract yourself with something interesting. Something that you can show and hold in your hands. Intrigue your baby and then his curiosity will win. If you are on the street, you can take a small stick (pebble, leaf) and say: “Oh, look, what did I find? What do you think she can do? Maybe you can use it to dig the ground? Need to try!" After these words, the little tracker will forget about his demands and attempts to hysteria, and will quickly rush to try whether a stick can really dig a hole in the ground. This can be done with any object that catches your eye. The main thing is to come up with a fun application. Be sure to take into account the age of the fidget when using such techniques. If this method works great at 2-3 years old, then at 4-5 years old you will already have to show your imagination, based on the level of intelligence of your clever child.
Parents should follow a clear sequence in their actions regarding the list of established prohibitions:
- If it is forbidden to play with matches today, then tomorrow, and in a month, it is still forbidden to play with them.
- If mom forbids something, dad should support her and not contradict her. Otherwise, having received a refusal from one family member, the child will turn to another and get what he wants. Such actions will instill permissiveness and willfulness in the child.
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