Many modern people admit that they have certain complexes. Basically, human complexes are psychological in nature, that is, they are associated with communication, behavior and interaction with others. Not everyone decides to work on themselves, because any complex has a secondary benefit. With its help, a person avoids some unpleasant situations for himself, which can really help him get out of his comfort zone. This article will discuss the main human complexes, their manifestations, as well as the reasons for their formation.
What are complexes
Complexes in psychology are mental processes that are formed in the unconscious and affect the development of the psyche. The concept of “complex” was introduced into scientific literature by S. Freud’s student, Carl Gustav Jung.
The complex can be compared to a pain point. This is always some kind of shortcoming, real or imagined, which in a person’s mind is exaggerated to the maximum. For example, the most common of them are a big nose and crooked teeth. A person may have an absolutely normal appearance, but in his perception it is distorted.
The complex may not necessarily be caused by appearance. Character traits and painful attachment also become the cause of their occurrence. For example, an inferiority complex, a victim.
Complex as a mental phenomenon
Today the term complex
very common in everyday life.
In addition to the Oedipus complex
the inferiority complex
,
the guilt complex
,
the Napoleon complex
and the catchword
complex
have become the talk of the town .
A complex as a mental phenomenon is a stable formation, manifested by thoughts, desires and actions, including neurotic symptoms, formed around a highly significant emotional experience, often repressed
, which can be discovered thanks to
a complex of associations
in the process of conducting
psychoanalysis
or
an associative experiment
.
This understanding of the complex
was the next important step in psychology, and was formally marked by the introduction of the concept of
the Oedipus complex
.
Freud began researching this topic back in 1897, but the term Oedipus complex
was used for the first time only in 1910 in the article “
On a special type of object choice in men
”:
“The child begins to desire his mother in this new sense and again begins to hate his father as a rival who stands in the way of the fulfillment of this desire; he falls, as we say, into the power of the Oedipus complex
.”
Freud also mentions the mother complex
,
prostitute complex
and
parental complex
.
But this article is not about the theory of complexes, but about the Oedipus complex
and complexes associated with it.
Jung publishes his first work on complexes as mental phenomena
only next year: “
Review of the theory of complexes
,” but it is more fundamental in nature and becomes fundamental in his teaching.
The feeling that Jung was the founder of the concept of complexes
connected with the fact that Freud quickly
lost interest in this topic
, and, continuing to use this idea implicitly in the technique of psychoanalysis, developed only two concepts of complexes -
the Oedipus complex
and
the castration complex
.
And Jung made the doctrine of complexes the cornerstone of his analytical psychology
(as he called his direction after his break with Freud in 1912).
Jung even wanted to rename his school the psychology of complexes
.
What types of complexes are there?
All complexes can be divided into 2 groups:
- Physical (regarding height/weight/appearance/voice, etc.);
- Mental;
Mental complexes - dissatisfaction with the state of society, discrepancy between one’s expectations from life and reality, etc. They largely manifest themselves in relationships with people. It’s easier with physical complexes: a person is embarrassed by his appearance, weight, skin color. They are caused by both beauty standards imposed by society and real problems (disability, speech impediments, etc.).
Victim complex
On your life's path you will meet at least one person who constantly becomes poor and arouses pity for himself. At first you think: “how cruel fate is towards him, he should be pitied.” Then you notice that the person is deliberately repeating the same scenario. The victim does not seek to get out of his situation.
Why? Because it's profitable. They are pitied and attract a lot of attention with their behavior. The victim complex usually affects orphans or children who did not receive enough parental attention. Or whose parents were too strict. They try with all their might to evoke pity and compassion. But they never make any attempt to change their life for the better. Because subconsciously they do not want to leave the victim state.
Napoleon complex, growth complex
The short man complex or Napoleon complex is one of the most famous. It appears when a person of short stature tries in every possible way to compensate for his shortcomings. Increased aggression, flashy wealth, etc.
Girls, on the contrary, have a complex about being tall. Everything is connected with stereotypes imposed in society: “a man is tall and strong, and a woman is weak and defenseless.”
Age complexes
Concerns about age are more common among women. Middle-aged ladies are embarrassed by their age and try in every possible way to hide it. As one of the manifestations of the complex: a woman wears short skirts, unfashionable teenage clothes, looks vulgar and inappropriate. It also manifests itself in behavior and speech.
In men, age complexes manifest themselves differently. Due to the fact that by a certain age a man has not been able to build a career and start a family, he falls into depression and apathy.
What does messianic complex mean?
The Messiah is a savior, a spiritual leader. A person’s desire to help all those who suffer, to save everyone and everyone from themselves is a messianic complex, a savior complex.
A girl chooses marginal men for herself and believes that they will change with her - this is a clear manifestation of the savior complex. The complex occurs in romantic relationships and friendships. A man is more inclined to “save” materialistic friends or manipulative parents.
Electra complex and Oedipus complex
In child psychology there are 2 common complexes: Electra and Oedipus. This is the attraction of a daughter to her father (Electra), and the attraction of a son to her mother (Oedipus).
The differences between the two conditions are not significant. In both complexes, the child wants the parent of the opposite sex to belong only to him. Electra is jealous of her father for her mother, and Oedipus is jealous of her mother for her father. At the same time, the child experiences complex remorse for his feelings.
The condition does not disappear with the transition to adulthood, but is aggravated by sexual problems. To the point that the child is looking for a partner similar to his father/mother.
How to avoid developing psychological complexes in children?
It is necessary to consider recommendations on how not to form and how to deal with existing children's complexes.
Always take an interest in the affairs of your children, be attentive to them, show that they are important to you, find out their opinion even in resolving your own issues or family issues. For example, when arranging a room, you can consult with your child. Discuss how best to arrange furniture, where to put toys, where to hang photographs and paintings. You can also discuss the menu for the week.
Help your children express emotions, not only happiness and joy, but also sadness and dissatisfaction. Your daughter or son has every right to be angry, whims, and fears - this is absolutely normal, even if at times it looks too violent.
Do not negatively evaluate the child’s personality. You can talk about an action, as if separating it from the person.
It is also worth giving the child the opportunity to determine for himself how correctly he behaved in a given situation. This way he will feel responsible for his actions, learn to make decisions and understand their consequences.
The imposition of standards of behavior and gender stereotypes has an extremely negative impact. Do not compare your child with others or with a reference model.
Teach children to experience not only victories, but also failures and defeats. This is an inevitable experience that is very important for the formation of a full-fledged personality. Without this, it is impossible to draw the correct conclusion from the current situation and correct it in the future.
Don’t set the bar for achievements too high: it’s stupid to scold a child for getting a “B” in the diary or third place in a competition.
Excessive strictness only harms. Children whose parents are very domineering, suppressing emotionality, spontaneity and the desire to explore the world become the most complex.
Explain to your children that adapting to everyone is pointless: there are so many people, so many opinions, and it is impossible to please absolutely everyone. Love your child for who he is; love helps in getting rid of psychological complexes.
Why complexes arise
The causes of complexes are divided into several groups:
- traumatic experience (insults, bullying, psychological pressure);
- unhealthy relationships with parents (overbearing single mother, strict father, development in a single-parent family);
- stereotypes, social pressure;
- psychical deviations.
People with active mental disorders are more prone to developing complexes than mentally healthy people.
Where do complexes come from?
In adulthood, complexes are rarely formed. More often it is a relic of adolescence, which a person could not get rid of in his conscious years. If childhood and adolescence were painful, a person is likely to carry several complexes into adulthood.
How to understand that a person has complexes
If a person constantly worries about a problem, it is not easy to hide it. It reveals everything: from appearance to timbre of speech, random phrases in a conversation. We have collected 5 obvious signs that a person has complexes:
- Focus on the problem.
- An appearance that attracts a lot of attention.
- The habit of excessively complaining or praising oneself.
- A man talks only about himself.
- Asks for compliments.
When a person constantly talks about a shortcoming that is invisible to others, it immediately reveals complexes.
Signs
There are several common signs of the appearance of complexes in humans:
- increased concern about one’s behavior;
- close attention to inappropriate actions as a reaction to the actions of other people;
- excessive constraint psychologically and physically when compared with others;
- increased anxiety associated with meeting significant people;
- reactions to various situations and people that are atypical for a balanced individual.
Separately, each of these signs is not significant, but collectively these are symptoms of the manifestation of various complexes or shortcomings that the individual carefully hides from the outside world.
How to get rid of complexes
An experienced psychotherapist will make it easier to get rid of complexes. It is almost impossible to do this on your own, because you do not know what shaped the development of your complex. We cannot look at our lives objectively. Therefore, each psychologist has his own psychologist.
Why are complexes dangerous?
Society doesn't like people with complexes. They attract the same complex people. For example, the common pair “victim + savior”. Such relationships do not end with a happy ending. Complex people rarely achieve success in life. More often they cannot build healthy relationships with others and create a full-fledged family.
Is it necessary to fight complexes?
Putting up and living side by side with complexes is harmful. This has a significant impact on your self-esteem and psyche. Each complex requires its own approach. It is impossible to get rid of everyone at once. You need to deal with problems consistently and gradually so that they do not turn into a serious obstacle to a happy life.
Psychological complexes: types
This type of human complexes affects relationships with oneself and the world around us. Unfortunately, few modern people can boast of the absence of complexes. Most are, to one degree or another, concerned about their inability to communicate or difficult relationships with relatives. Of course, all this affects the quality of life and makes a person insecure.
Guilt complex
The cause of its occurrence is, as a rule, incorrect relationships in the family. In this case, a person constantly feels guilty even when there is no visible misconduct on his part. Such a psychological complex leaves a serious imprint on the formation of personality. Full development becomes impossible. Many people are familiar with the guilt complex. It is laid down by parents with constant criticism and endless claims to the child. As a result, faith in one's own strength is lost. A person begins to feel unable to cope with even a basic task and is very afraid of upsetting loved ones. The formed habit of meeting the expectations of others only strengthens over time. A lot of energy is wasted simply on constantly making excuses and living in illusions. A guilt complex is not good for anyone. The individual wastes too many resources on “being” good to society. At the same time, his own dreams, needs and aspirations remain unfulfilled.
Victim complex
In this case, there is an immersion in the world of one’s own experiences. The victim complex greatly interferes with remaining adequate and correctly perceiving the surrounding reality. Such people constantly feel the injustice of life. It’s as if they are preparing for defeat in advance, taking a humble position. This mentality deprives them of the desire to fight. They are driven by the fear of experiencing unpleasant feelings, of again finding themselves in a humiliated position. The victim complex provokes a painful feeling of helplessness. A person’s psychological complexes are distinguished by the fact that they lead the individual into a state of internal devastation. Modern people often do not notice how much they suffer. The fact is that everyone tends to justify their fears as an unfortunate coincidence of circumstances. Few are willing to take responsibility and really work seriously on character.
Hero complex
Some human complexes are quite rare, but cause a lot of suffering. The hero complex is one of them. In this case, the person constantly exceeds the norm of his capabilities. He strives to do more than he can, and when something doesn’t work out, he is deeply disappointed in himself. In an effort to live up to the ideal image, such a person often takes on impossible tasks. From the outside he often gives the impression of a strong and self-confident person, but those around him do not always realize how much effort it takes to make such an impression. A person who “plays” a superhero, as a rule, does not even know what serious problems he hides in the depths of his soul. All energy is spent simply on appearing to be a good and self-sufficient individual, capable of achieving maximum results.
Peter Pan Complex
Some psychological complexes affect a person in such a way that he loses the ability to adequately assess his own emotions. The Peter Pan complex is expressed in the fact that a person gradually falls into childhood. He relieves himself of all responsibility for what is happening and lives an easy life, not caring about anything or anyone. An individual walks until the morning, has fun, spends money outside of his income. Often such people quit their jobs for the sake of some imaginary pleasures. This condition is also fraught with certain consequences, especially for others. Since such people are extremely infantile, all problems, as a rule, are transferred to close relatives. They are not able to think farsightedly and prefer to live for today.
Martyr complex
Another extreme to which a person goes when trying to protect himself from depressing reality. The martyr complex is expressed in the fact that the individual seems to deliberately invent numerous trials for himself. The person gives the impression of a sufferer who is constantly worried about something. He does not see anything good in objective reality, because it categorically does not suit him. And the more complex the problems, the more courageously he tries to overcome them. This type of complex in a person is often formed under the influence of such a phenomenon as severe psychological trauma. Having experienced the need to deal with obstacles several times, it later becomes difficult to get rid of the feeling that events and circumstances in life are not going in the best way. People get used to considering themselves victims of circumstances and do not want to do anything useful for their own personal growth.
Inferiority complex
The most common syndrome that can significantly complicate life. People suffering from it have a way of thinking that is aimed at self-destruction. The individual does not believe in himself and considers himself unable to cope with the problem. An inferiority complex is expressed in self-doubt and fear of trying something new. A person is completely immersed in his fears and does not find the inner strength to start thinking constructively. The feeling of his own worthlessness accompanies him everywhere and everywhere, no matter what business he has to take on. This psychological complex occurs in many people and, most often, a person cannot control it. The feeling of one's own inferiority does not allow one to take a position that truly corresponds to the level of knowledge and abilities. As a result, motivation begins to suffer and the desire to do anything disappears.
Excellent student complex
Such a person gets used to doing everything perfectly, using his resources to the maximum. But the “excellent student” does not know how to cope with difficulties, he is afraid to get into difficult situations because he does not know where to look for a way out. This habit makes you remain dissatisfied with your results even when every effort is made to solve an important task. The excellent student complex does not allow one to develop fully and with pleasure precisely because the individual does not see his own merits, but prefers to notice only his shortcomings.
Indecision complex
This is the problem of many people who have stopped in one place and do not want to move on. The inability to cope with your anxiety leads to the fact that important chances are missed and the desire to act in the necessary direction disappears. The individual is immersed in his own experiences, literally dissolving in them, forgetting about real life. And the more a person is focused on the prospect of possible failure, the more strength she will need to cope with indecision. Fears not only devastate you from the inside, they interfere with the formation of a happy attitude.
Thus, complexes really significantly interfere with a person’s life and active self-improvement. The need to work on yourself is more than justified. If complexes really create obstacles in your path, then something needs to be done. Contact the Irakli Pozharisky Psychology Center for advice. Working with a specialist will help you understand intrapersonal conflicts and begin to resolve them. Only by taking responsibility can you achieve a satisfactory result.
Where does self-dissatisfaction come from?
In psychology, there are five main sources of the emergence of complexes :
- The first important people in a child's life are parents. Children in their family experience reality for the first time, learn their first ideas about the world and themselves—the human worldview is born. Parents have an important task: it depends on them whether the baby will love himself and how safe he will feel among people. Immature parents make many mistakes, saying unpleasant words to their child in a fit of anger. The parental couple will fade away, and later they may even regret what they said. But unfortunately, careless words will remain with the child forever and will influence his entire life.
The child grows up, friends appear in his life. At one point, the opinion of peers becomes very significant for the growing individual. The authority of parents fades into the background. This is most clearly observed in adolescence. The unstable hormonal background and psyche of a teenager absorb everything, without understanding the objectivity of what is happening next to him and in relation to him.- The other half can affect an individual's self-image even into adulthood. When we fall in love, butterflies in our stomachs prevent us from seeing the real state of affairs. A person in love, being in a state of euphoria, believes everything that the object of his feelings says. For example, unrequited love can lead a girl to the conclusion that she is not smart or beautiful enough or make a confident boy or man doubt his merits.
- Society is the people among whom we live. Each of us strives to be similar to others, thus leveling the feeling of alienation and loneliness. Unfortunately, this does not always work out due to the presence of different social strata.
- Man as the source of his complexes: sometimes the individual himself, due to his character, upbringing and overly fantastic thinking, ascribes to himself something that does not exist. Dooming yourself to suffering.
Without complexes
Is it possible to live without such disorders? There is an opinion that the absence of any psychological restrictions is also a kind of problem.
From the point of view of the average person, uncomplicated people have bright, lively energy, they look confident, act decisively, actively, and do not feel shy or awkward. But in this case, we can talk not about the absence of hidden experiences, but about their small influence on the psyche.
Such a person is characterized by:
- adequate assessment of one’s abilities and capabilities;
- positive perception of oneself and one’s role in society;
- a friendly attitude towards others and the world in general;
- self-confidence;
- possession of a number of one’s own beliefs, opinions, ideas, adherence to principles.
Getting rid of the syndrome
First of all, you need to learn to correctly perceive and evaluate yourself (appearance, mental and physical abilities). You can do this yourself or take a psychocorrection course from a psychologist. Then you need to decide on goals, motivation and what has been achieved to date - determine the level of self-realization for today. Next, you need to decide what you need to do to avoid feeling unhappy. You should change your job, stop communicating with certain people, move to another city, or go on a trip.
Almost all complexes and fears lead to a breakdown in relations with society. You should not refuse to communicate with people. You need to learn to interact with them and get out of conflict situations. It is better for an individual to enroll in courses where he will have to directly interact with one partner or a group of people. It is recommended to reconsider the importance of values. The complexes do not require drug treatment.
Main manifestations of complexes
Psychological trauma - what is it in psychology
Specific symptoms may vary depending on the situation. In some cases, some emotions are quite reasonable. We can talk about a complex only if the attitude is very far from reality, and the reaction to an existing or imaginary shortcoming is too intense and interferes with a normal life.
Complexes are always a distortion of reality
In some cases, what a person calls a complex is not one at all. Typically, such a person has the following symptoms:
- Feels that she cannot be loved because of her shortcomings.
- Constantly fixates on the minus that she came up with.
- Blames his parents and acquaintances for provoking the development of this disadvantage.
- Feels awkward if you have to do work that will be evaluated by another person. A psychologically mature person always has his own evaluation criteria, which he relies on first of all, although he takes into account other people’s opinions.
- Shows inappropriate perfectionism.
- Accuses himself of treating others badly or feeling that strangers are picking on him and don’t like him for some reason.
- When the need arises to communicate with strangers or people with a high social status, he feels awkward.
- An imaginary deficiency is considered the cause of all troubles, even if this is not at all true. In turn, the real errors that led to failure are not analyzed.
For your information. A person with complexes is constantly constrained in his actions, feelings and thoughts.
