Betrayal scares almost everyone in a relationship, be it love or even close friendships. Fear is born from the need for personal identification, the experience of one’s personality as part of a larger one, and correlation with it. A common identification is “I am a member of a family union.” This is the existence of a “we”. If it suddenly turns out that a partner simultaneously belongs to another, this fact is perceived as a betrayal, an event when, without the knowledge of the other party, my social identification has changed. Perceiving yourself as part of a whole, a group, even of two, is an important need. Therefore, it is clear why the blow of betrayal is so painful. When a partner has another “we” on his side, I become part of a union of three without consent.
How to survive infidelity and betrayal by your husband or wife? It is impossible to react to betrayal easily. As long as there is a feeling of union with a partner, the space of “we”, betrayal will always be painful. If you are looking for an answer on how to survive the pain of betrayal, it means that your partner was not indifferent to you, you united as a whole. Here pain is a natural, inevitable reaction from the severance of emotional ties. However, knowledge helps to live through these painful feelings.
Reasons why men or women cheat
The first thing any person wants to find out after cheating is the reasons that prompted their partner to take such a step. As a rule, they are quite banal.
Reasons why men cheat:
- Ordinary. The man wanted to try something new or simply decided to prove to himself that he could still seduce other women. These are mostly one-time connections.
- Alcohol. Many infidelities among men occur “in a drunken shop.” Alcohol clouds the mind and activates male instincts. Treason committed under the influence of alcohol should not be taken seriously.
- Differences in temperaments. If a man lacks sex, he will look for it on the side. This is not an excuse. It is a fact.
- I met “the one and only.” If a couple gets together under force (the birth of a child or settlement), then after a few years the men can find a more suitable girl.
- Weak character. Sometimes a man simply “cannot resist” under the influence of a more temperamental woman.
Reasons why women cheat:
- Misunderstanding. The woman believes that her partner is not able to understand her and is looking for attention on the side.
- Revenge. Girls rarely forgive cheating. They try, at a minimum, to answer their partner in kind.
- Lack of love. If partners do not find love with each other, they try to find it in someone else.
- Long absence of a companion. The partner is constantly away and spends little time with the girl. She begins to seek attention from other men.
- Spontaneity. If the relationship began spontaneously, it may end in betrayal and separation.
In any case, if a couple sincerely loves each other, the partners will never cheat. Even under the influence of alcohol.
How to deal with betrayal
Treat it as another lesson in your life, from which you need to take only useful things. The experience gained may be painful, but it will help to cope with similar situations in the future. It will take time to resolve the consequences. But it is precisely this that will give immunity to the next negativity from other people.
Betrayal is difficult for anyone to survive
Stages of experiencing betrayal
All our feelings change over time, acceptance of a situation goes through several stages, and what at first seemed completely impossible can at some point become the norm of life. Therefore, how to survive a partner’s betrayal can be guided not by the advice of friends, but by the stages necessary for our psyche to accept and respond adequately in any situation.
Stage 1. Shock, stress, denial
Mostly last from a couple of minutes to several days. If a woman only suspects cheating, she will try to find excuses for her husband and will want to shield him from herself. But the husband’s confessions are not always direct evidence of betrayal: “Well, what are you making up? Are you beside yourself, dear?” Shock makes it difficult to think clearly. How to survive betrayal.
Stage 2. Anger at yourself
A woman begins to look for the reason for men’s leftward movements within herself. Often this stage passes in a couple of hours, but it can last for several weeks, or even longer. The girl tries to analyze her actions, words, evaluate her appearance and her skills in different areas of life. She imposes on herself responsibility for the fact that her beloved chose someone else over her. It is better to go through this stage as quickly as possible, because long soul-searching does not solve the problem, but only extends it over time.
Stage 3. Aggression towards partner and lover
This period is important, because a person needs to switch aggression towards offenders in order to protect his psyche from “burnout.” It lasts for several weeks. A woman needs to throw out her anger at her husband and his mistress, and a desire for revenge appears. How to survive betrayal. But if you want to save the marriage, you will have to behave more restrained, since your mistress can use all your actions against you: “Look what she really is like. You lived with a monster!”
Stage 4. Inability to look into the future
Betrayal pulls a lady out of her usual way of life. If yesterday she was confident in the future, today she is afraid to look into the future, because the relationship will never be the same as before. Cheating undermines the most important thing - trust. It becomes especially scary when a man suggests breaking up, because then a woman’s life will become truly different.
Stage 5. The desire to return everything to its place
Our psyche seeks stability and comfort, so the wife begins to be overwhelmed with a feeling of love for her husband. Yes, the hatred has already passed, and the girl is ready to forgive the betrayal, if only her sweetheart was there as before. Betrayal to some extent helps to rethink our attitude towards each other and understand how important and necessary a person is to us.
Stage 6. “No” to the past
At this stage, if the marriage has survived, the spouses will try to rebuild the relationship. But it’s hard for a woman to trust her husband; she always wants to reproach him with betrayal, control him and demand new vows. It is better to restrain yourself; excessive display of resentment will not lead to anything good. It’s a good idea to redirect anger in another direction, for example, take care of yourself (sports, proper nutrition, style, and so on). In the case when the couple has separated, this stage serves as a kind of springboard for the woman to re-accept herself and start a different life.
Stage 7. Exhaustion
This period begins about six months after the incident. The spouses are tired of fighting, proving something, making peace and forgiving. They are mentally and physically exhausted. They become indifferent: the wife does not have the strength to return her husband to the family, or, if the spouses separated, coldness appears in the relationship. This stage simply must be survived. And, by the way, now you shouldn’t make important decisions about how to survive betrayal!
Stage 8. Conclusions
In the period from six months to a year, both the man and the woman make conclusions: whether they should really continue the relationship, whether they can trust each other, whether they can love again, support, and so on. As a result, they either finally break up or build a stronger union.
Why do people betray
Betrayal can be caused by many reasons, including jealousy, greed, power and fear. These reasons can push people, even people as close as family, to act against you for their own personal reasons, even if it hurts you. Stories of betrayal go back to the beginning of humankind. Regardless of the reasons, one thing is clear: the act of betrayal has consequences for both parties.
Self-love
Selfishness is one of the most distinctive qualities of traitors. Obsession with oneself and one's own benefit can sometimes be destructive. As long as they are comfortable communicating with you, they will smile in your face, even provide basic support if they know for sure that they can take advantage of you in the future. As soon as he receives everything that his soul required, such a person will leave without caring about your feelings. This manifestation of self-esteem is directly related to the characteristic of a person - hypocrisy.
Mental weakness
Cowardly, irresponsible and cowardly people most often betray people because they live according to the principle of simplicity. Because of their weakness, they solve their problems in life in the easiest ways, since they cannot keep promises and seek more honest and moral solutions to problems. Their most important argument is “this is how the circumstances developed, I could not influence them in any way.” Finding excuses and excuses is their favorite pastime. Because of the fear of not being realized in life, they leave at the expense of strong people, undermining their psychological and mental state.
Many traitors commit breaches of trust due to their own cowardice
Out of stupidity
As the well-known saying goes: “Measure seven times, cut once.” It’s the same in life. Think several times before taking any action. One wrong step can radically change someone's life. Due to your stupidity, your actions can cause severe pain without noticing it.
Where does meanness show up?
Alas, you can encounter betrayal at every step. Mean people are around us all the time. You can get a stab in the back at any moment from a person from whom you did not expect this at all: betrayal from a loved one, relative, work colleague, best friend, and so on.
In family life
If you've ever felt betrayed by a family member, you're not alone. In fact, most people feel betrayed by their family at some point in their lives. When your family betrays you, it can be especially painful because, according to most typical expectations, these are the people we can trust the most.
Some of the most common family betrayals that people experience are:
Infidelity
Gossip
Theft
Condemnation
Lie
Humiliation
Judging by these examples of family betrayal, it can be said that some of them are more destructive to the human psyche than others. However, any betrayal of trust destroys the foundation of any relationship.
A lie told with an honest face, looking you in the eye, is the end of trust, and it hurts. When your brother says nasty things about you behind your back, this is the kind of betrayal that is difficult to forgive. When your partner breaks their marital vows by cheating on you, it can be a betrayal that ends the relationship.
In friendship
Betrayal from a friend is many times more offensive given the fact that friends are often considered closer than family. Because of envy of success, material wealth, beauty and status. Ingratiating themselves with someone and then wiping their feet on a person is easy for them. But it may also be that the betrayal is unintentional and then there is a chance to restore friendship.
What does it mean to “survive betrayal”?
Does this mean that you never think about the problem again, never get hurt or angry? Does this mean you no longer blame your partner (or yourself)?
When people talk about getting over infidelity, they often mean different things in terms of what the outcome will look like or what it will take to get there. What does the recovery result look like? It's important to know where you want to go before you create a plan that will get you there.
For some people, taking revenge on a partner can be an important part of being able to survive infidelity. But demanding retribution or punishing the cheater after a certain time does not strengthen the marriage or promote a feeling of intimacy. Long-term revenge may be satisfying in the short term, but it almost always keeps you stuck in the past.
Going out of your way to show consideration, care, and love can sometimes serve as concrete expressions of remorse or a desire for change. When people want to stay in a relationship, surviving infidelity means striving to strengthen and maintain the relationship.
You won't be able to move forward if you remain with one foot out the door.
Uncertainty, which allows you to spend energy in a constructive way, drains it, and it is necessary for relationships to improve.
If, however, you decide to end the relationship, getting over the infidelity means no longer obsessing over the problem or your partner. This means redirecting your thoughts and behavior towards building a new life.
Is it true that everyone betrays
I dare say yes. At least once in his life, a person will commit betrayal for the benefit of his own comfort. Sometimes this happens completely unconsciously and thoughtlessly. But if you have a healthy psyche and a bright mind, you are friends with people not for profit, then cases of betrayal are reduced to a minimum. After all, you can betray not only a living being, but your faith, religion, and country. Don't think that by betraying you automatically become a bad person. On the contrary, analyze all your weaknesses and motive for action. You shouldn’t put the stigma on yourself that “people don’t change.” This will make your inner core thicker and you will no longer give in to such disgusting actions.
In fact, the person who betrayed thinks about what he did at least once. Here it is important for the traitor to realize the consequences of his actions and work through this issue.
Every person has had a treacherous act at least once in their life.
What to do to survive betrayal?
Betrayal brings pain and disappointment, especially to the person who never expected to be betrayed. The brain tries to comprehend what happened, the heart is torn by injustice, and the body does not want to accept the affection of a stranger. How to survive betrayal with dignity and at the same time, if you want, maintain the relationship?
If you are the cheated partner, you may find it helpful to learn what actions the cheating partner can take to help you get over the betrayal.
1. Acknowledgment: The cheating partner develops and expresses a clear understanding of what happened and its consequences.
2. Responsibility: The cheating partner bears full responsibility for the decisions and choices involved in reconciliation.
3. Remorse: The cheating partner expresses a sincere feeling of deep sadness, sorrow, or even pain for the harm they caused.
4. Reparations: The cheating partner engages in positive actions designed to minimize the harm and associated negative consequences associated with his or her actions.
5. Change: The cheating partner promises not to harm the injured partner in the future:
- agrees not to harm the injured partner in the same way;
- changes the conditions that contributed to the previous problem;
- acts differently when faced with similar situations in the future.
6. Release: the betrayed partner forgives the offense, voluntarily giving up the right to continue to punish his partner for what happened or to demand further retribution.
7. Reconciliation: Both partners commit to rebuilding a relationship based on mutual trust and caring.
If he's to blame
• It's no secret that many men are, to put it mildly, polygamous by nature. Therefore, for them, sex on the side is not a disaster. This is equivalent to any other vacation - sitting with friends in a bar, watching football, driving around the city at night, etc. That is, betrayal for him is not a personal insult, but simply a physiological action that has nothing to do with his feelings for you.
• A corporate party or any other drinking party, after which a man suddenly finds himself in the arms (or even in bed) of a charming woman. It seemed like I didn’t want to, but something went wrong.
• Sometimes a man who has a permanent woman, wife or lover, can fall in love. Not in you, and not because you are worse. It just happened somehow, by accident. Chemistry.
Options for the development of the event
Break off the relationship or save it?
Having experienced the first emotional shock after betrayal, partners begin to ask one simple question - what to do next? There are only two options here - forgive or break up.
First of all, it is worth analyzing what connects the partners. If the marriage was built only on joint care of children, it is unlikely that it will be possible to save the relationship. On the other hand, if a couple has minor children, it makes sense to save the marriage so as not to leave them without one of their parents.
The reason for the betrayal is also an important factor.
If it was a casual relationship under the influence of alcohol, there is no reason to worry. Of course, this is unpleasant, but we should not forget that the betrayal in this case occurred in a semi-inappropriate state, when the person did not control his thoughts and actions.
It's another matter if the partner deliberately cheated on his partner. The majority of couples then break up. Spouses cannot forgive each other that a person deliberately preferred someone else to them. This is primarily due to the feeling of humiliation experienced by the offended party. Dealing with it is not so easy.
In any case, it is important to remember that restoring a relationship after cheating is very difficult. You should not think that after reconciliation, the partners will immediately begin to communicate in the same way as before. Psychologists compare trust to a glass. When it falls, it breaks into many small pieces
They can be glued together, but nevertheless, traces of the fall will still be visible. Only a caring attitude and time can dull the bitterness of betrayal. This requires the mutual desire of both partners.
Depression or revenge? Neither one nor the other!
“A truly close person is always significant and valuable, and therefore, in the event of betrayal on his part, you may experience psychological states characterized by a wide range of different emotional reactions of the depressive type: from depression, sadness, apathy to feelings of resentment, disappointment,” says clinical psychologist, presenter of original courses and trainings, coach Boris Kononov
. According to the psychologist, psychological defense mechanisms in the form of fantasizing about revenge can also work, but, as a rule, over time the traitor is devalued and aggressive fantasizing weakens.
“In the case of betrayal of a loved one in relation to a person whose own “I” is higher, as a rule, all sorts of violent manifestations arise on the part of the latter, ranging from verbal forms of aggression and ending with causing physical harm to the offender, up to revenge in the form of murder, - says the clinical psychologist. “For example, a St. Petersburg historian, a specialist in the military history of France, Oleg Sokolov, satisfying his “Napoleonic Ego,” cold-bloodedly and with particular cynicism took the life of his student, a co-author of scientific works, with whom differences arose in personal and intimate relationships.”
A logical question arises: how not to fall into either extreme and survive a crisis life situation, forgive loved ones for their betrayal and abandon the “symmetrical answer”?
“Of course, each story of betrayal is unique in its own way, and, unfortunately, there is no ideal recipe, but there are general recommendations that can help you independently survive a traumatic situation without much harm to your own psychological health,” says Boris Kononov
. Here are his recommendations:
- Firstly, you should first try to calmly accept the fact of betrayal, recognizing the objective negative qualities of the offender - after all, with the weakening of the importance of the other person, your own mental pain also decreases.
- Secondly, recognize the fact of betrayal as having happened in the past - after all, you need to live in the present, looking optimistically into a bright future, and not looking back with resentment at yesterday.
- Thirdly, analyze the “I” of one’s own personality for egoism in order to prevent it from strengthening in the pursuit of petty revenge, which, as a rule, gives a temporary illusion of satisfying one’s own Ego, but does not at all exalt a person as a person.
“To understand the phenomenon of revenge, it is necessary to turn to simpler affects that rule the roost of the psyche,” says psychologist Alexander Skurtul
. – An attack by one living creature on another is often dictated by aggression for protection. The logic is something like this: “Someone wants to destroy me (deprive me of benefits, demote me in the hierarchy, drive me away), so I have to fight for my life.” The fact is that betrayal is also perceived by a person as an attack on his self. Betrayal humiliates us, self-worth falls, we experience a complex of unpleasant feelings that deprive us of optimism and faith in a bright future. In order to restore self-worth, you want to inflict no less damage on the offender - which in primitive culture is considered the restoration of justice.”
However, if in the animal world each act of humiliation was indeed directly linked to further chances of survival, then in human civilization, betrayal, according to the expert, simply evokes feelings that encourage us to worry about life due to evolutionary inertia, but nothing threatens life.
If a partner leaves us or a brother discredits our name among friends, then revenge will only increase the pain in this world and give us a little relief. Therefore, according to the psychologist, it is important to remain aware and understand the feelings that control us. It is important to soberly assess the meaning, means and results. And, of course, ask yourself the main question: “What will this give me?” Isn't it better to direct your efforts in a positive, creative direction? Try to abstract yourself from thoughts of betrayal and focus on what brings you pleasure.
How to survive betrayal and breakup?
Often, the fact of sexual infidelity becomes a serious test in the relationship of two people. Practice shows that in 86% of cases, betrayal of a partner in a family becomes a psychological trauma. In 62% - the reason for breaking up relationships, divorce. A feeling of abandonment, uselessness, pain, guilt, resentment - these are the feelings of someone who has been cheated on. The familiar world collapsed. Trust, like fragile Bohemian glass, broke into hundreds of small particles. The one they loved betrayed.
The consequences of betrayal and loss of a partner are often accompanied by sleep disturbances and eating disorders. Chronic diseases worsen and new, psychosomatic diseases are acquired. Constant bad mood and a feeling of loss even lead to thoughts of suicide.
If you have a full “bouquet” of symptoms or an unwillingness to live, a consultation with a psychiatrist or neurologist is recommended.
However, the main thing that a person needs in this situation is support, participation and attention.
Here's a short course in surviving cheating:
Start chatting
The feeling of abandonment leads to the idea that no one needs a person at all. Everyone has a “soul mate,” and the loner is pitiful and uninteresting. In fact, there are always people around who care. There are also single friends who will gladly respond to an offer to spend time together.
It is worth remembering all your friends, acquaintances, close people, relatives. Note for yourself where and when you met, what you did, what moments of spending time with them brought joy and pleasure. Think about when and with whom you can meet in the near future, what pleasant and interesting things you can do. Who to visit, call. Plan specific dates and be sure to do it.
Expand your social circle
If your friends are your husband’s friends, and you feel uncomfortable with them, you can broaden your horizons and meet new people. There are a lot of clubs, public entertainment organizations, private master classes, support groups, gyms, swimming pools, yoga centers that can interest you with their activities and become a source of new acquaintances.
Think about what you like or were once passionate about. Maybe there is something left that I wanted to do earlier, but for some reason it was postponed and forgotten. The time has come to put it into practice.
Pay attention to your child
Children, as you know, are the flowers of life. However, if you don’t take care of the flowers - water them, fertilize them, protect them from strong winds, frosts and pests - they can get sick and die. An irritated, lost parent has a detrimental effect on the psyche and inner world of the child. Right now you need each other more than ever.
Spend time together. Walk, joke, watch a funny movie, find common interests, hug and tell him how much you love him.
Remove your ex's personal belongings
If your partner, perhaps already an ex, lives separately, not in the family, but at the same time his things surround you, constantly catch your eye, reminding you of him, of what happened, and causing pain, remove them.
Sometimes you have a strong desire to tear your shirts into shreds or throw them out of the window: don’t restrain yourself, cut. Let your anger come out.
Eliminate guilt
“It’s my own fault” – a familiar phrase? I would like to remind you that relationships are the work of two people and, no matter what happens in the relationship, both are to blame. One withdrew, the other shifted responsibility, became cowardly, let it take its course - it will sort itself out. Reluctance to resolve issues that arise leads to discord and rupture in relationships. There can be many reasons why a partner cheated: lack of sex, rare sex, intimate intimacy that does not bring satisfaction, “drunk,” love has passed, lack of sexual desire or psychological intimacy. In any case, betrayal might not have happened if the person’s position had been mature: problems need to be solved, and not avoided.
Responsibility for betrayal lies with the one who made the decision to change and cheated.
Increase your self-esteem
Self-flagellation and looking for flaws in yourself will not lead to anything good. You are no worse than the one with whom you cheated, with whom you left. There is no insurance against betrayal. They cheat on beautiful and amateurish people, smart and not so smart, successful businesswomen and housewives, well-groomed and unkempt, slender and “size +”. It's not about what you look like, what you do, how old you are, or how you cook. It's about the personal qualities of the one who cheated.
Make a list of your strengths and achievements. Answer the questions: what am I? What is my feature, uniqueness? What is my strength? Praise yourself for each item on the list, you deserve it.
Heal the grudge
Children often fall during childhood. They are hurt and offended at the same time. Physical pain is similar to mental pain. Both need to be treated. The mother feels sorry for her child, explains that this happens, helps to take safety measures in the future and heals the soul, smears the wounds with brilliant green and heals the body.
In adult life, resentment settles in the soul. Contrary to common sense, they do not try to “cure” the offense, but carefully store it in the soul, “dragging a suitcase without a handle, filled with stones” through their lives.
Unreacted, unprocessed resentment affects the quality of life. The emotional state worsens. Painful memories trigger headaches. Irritability appears, physical condition worsens, psychosomatic diseases develop, leading to serious consequences and health problems.
It is impossible to solve a problem by accumulating negative thoughts, emotions, and experiences. Resentment is a childish position. Close your eyes and take a journey into your inner world. Imagine your inner child, that little girl/boy living inside you, everyone has one. Become an attentive, caring and understanding parent to him. Take pity on your inner child, just as your mother did as a child. Take him in your arms, sit him on your lap, hug him. Pat it on the head. Say that you know what happened and understand his feelings. That you are always there and will never leave him. Tell him how much you love the baby sitting on your lap. Give him the support he needs. Be grateful that you have it. Kiss and say goodbye, see you soon. Return to the here and now.
Mental wounds do not heal unless they are treated. Live your life to the fullest. Take care of yourself and remember: there is always someone next to you who is ready to help, you just have to want it and take a step towards it.
What not to do after your husband cheats
Of course, this is difficult, but you should restrain yourself and not throw hysterics. You shouldn’t shout hurtful words with teary eyes or beg to change, to think about the children. A woman should not ask for details of infidelity or seek meetings with her husband’s mistress in order to sort things out. This will only bring additional pain, and getting out of this state will be doubly difficult.
A woman’s task after her husband’s betrayal is to keep her mind as sane as possible.
In a calm state, she will know exactly whether she should forgive her husband or turn the page and start a new life.
How to survive betrayal and maintain a relationship?
Families are structured differently. Some people end the relationship as soon as they find out about their partner’s betrayal. Others are trying to save their family. It is in order to survive betrayal and save the family that you need to go through the following 6 stages.
Accept the fact of betrayal
This is the initial and perhaps the most difficult step.
The first advice from a psychologist on how to survive the betrayal of a loved one is to accept the fact of betrayal. Accepting means agreeing that there was betrayal. Do not praise it, do not agree with it, do not resign yourself and do not submit to fate. For one of the partners, accepting means saying: “Yes, I was cheated on.” For another - “Yes, I changed.” Without this, all other steps are impossible, since by denying the problem, we cannot begin to solve it.
Sometimes it takes one day to accept and admit the fact of betrayal, sometimes it takes months. Don't give up if you can't do it right now, keep trying.
Find out the reason
Yes, there are reasons for cheating (and you need to accept that too). A reason is not the same as someone's fault. No one is to blame for cheating. But they happen because something is missing in the relationship, because of some kind of push.
Sometimes the reasons may not be clear enough to the partner who cheated. Without their clear and mutual understanding, it is difficult to move forward.
Change if possible
Also, in order to survive the betrayal of a loved one, you can try to change. Knowing the reason, you can think about the following questions: “What did I do (did) and what did I not do (did)? Can I give what was missing, change myself and the situation? I want this?" This is a question not only for the one who was cheated on, but also for the one who cheated.
Unfortunately, sometimes betrayal is the result of behavior that a person is not yet ready to change in himself. In this case, trying to maintain a relationship is like fighting windmills.
Articulate the value of these relationships
What about a partner is still valuable to you? Why did you get into a relationship in the first place? Why did you love each other? What would you be sorry to lose if you break up? Only by remembering what is valuable to you in a relationship will you be able to improve it after cheating. Both partners should ask this question, and only if both have sufficiently meaningful answers, does it make sense to move on.
Be patient while trust is restored
Cheating almost always destroys trust in a relationship. In some couples it recovers on its own over time. Some experience more difficulty with this: on the one hand, the person understands that the partner is not doing anything like that, but on the other hand, disturbing thoughts creep in and they constantly want to control the situation. If this is left to chance, the relationship will collapse, and it is safer to immediately involve a third party in the situation - a psychologist.
Should betrayal be forgiven?
Should betrayal be forgiven? Undoubtedly. But only for yourself, not for the sake of the betrayer. Daily thoughts about how to survive the betrayal of a loved one will not allow you to move forward. They will begin to poison your life and will not allow you to create new relationships in which there will be no place for deception. When you were exchanged for someone else, when you were given a backhand blow - how to forgive the betrayal? Forgive in order to live and enjoy every day?
If the person who betrayed you has a conscience, then it will punish him. Tears will punish you more severely than your words. Only conscience can plunge a person into repentance; it is impossible to hide or escape from it. It is not easy to survive a person’s betrayal, but it is possible if you do the work on yourself. And let the bonus of the trauma suffered be the opportunity to meet new people, events, and feelings along the way. Never before has life stopped because of betrayal. Don't stop yourself.
How to regain self-confidence
Often the self-esteem of a person who has experienced betrayal is significantly reduced. And to increase it and restore self-confidence, psychologists suggest the following:
- Don't let your emotions drown out your reasoning for a long time. Don't forget to take care of yourself, look after yourself and look after yourself. Review your nutrition system, start playing sports.
- Try to protect yourself from the person who betrayed you. After all, sometimes such people can bring a lot of trouble.
- Don't give up communicating and meeting with friends. They are the best remedy for healing your spiritual wounds.
And under no circumstances blame yourself for the event that happened. None of your actions can be the reason or justification for betrayal.